Crooked Crosses
by Emily the wild one
Summary: Severus Snape and Lily Evans, fifth year at Hogwarts and beyond. This is merely my interpretation of what might have happened, had things not gone wrong.
1. Chapter 1

Part 1

Chapter 1

****DISCLAIMER**:**These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: Something I've wanted to do for a very long time. Hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoy writing. **

_He was kneeling in a darkened room that appeared to be an infant's nursery. Even in the dim half-light, he could see that the walls were brightly decorated, and what could only be the room's resident sat, screaming, in a crib pushed against the wall. In his arms he held a woman, whose face was lined with years that he had not witnessed, but was unmistakable all the same. Lily. Lily Evans. Dead. Gone. Lily. _

_He was alone. _

_He was alone and in the dark. _

_He was alone and in the dark, and he could not move or see. _

_And then, quite suddenly, he was being shaken awake…._

"Sev? Sev, wake up! We're almost there! We have to get changed!" Lily Evans's voice forced open the eyes of Severus Snape faster than any sound could. He touched his forehead: it was slick with cold sweat. She didn't seem unnerved, so he must not have called out in his nightmare.

At his lack of a reply, Lily's brow furrowed, and she tipped her head to the side very slightly. Severus, a veteran of reading her emotions, knew that she was concerned.

"It's nothing," he said, smiling reassuringly. He stood, hefted her trunk onto his shoulder, and lowered it gently to the seat across from them. Yes, Severus was rather slighter than most fifteen-year-old boys. But he wasn't weak. His body was muscular yet compact, like a runner's. So unlike the perfect Quidditch-player's build of James Potter, who ensured that Severus did plenty of running.

Lily, occupied with pulling on her Hogwarts robes over her Muggle attire, neglected to notice Severus's sudden scowl. Once finished, however, she frowned at him once more. "Aren't you changing too, Severus?"

He grinned at her again. How easily she could make him smile, even without trying. "I already am, remember?" He held out his arms as best he could in the narrow space.

Lily's face broke into a smile then too, and it was like the sun's first peep over the horizon at dawn: no less magnificent for all the times he'd seen it.

The train, already slowing, now began its lengthy halt, and Severus took his trunk in one hand and Lily's in the other. "You don't have to do that!" she said crossly, attempting to relieve him of her belongings. "I can carry it!"

Severus defied her attempts to take the trunk, saying only, "I know you can. But so can I."

Once Severus ensured that Lily was safely ensconced in a circle of friends at the Gryffindor table, he took his place among his fellow Slytherins, though he did sit rather apart from them.

There was the usual "first day back" events—the sorting, a speech from Dumbledore, keep out of the Forbidden Forest, then the magnificent feast, which Severus's stomach welcomed after months of near-starvation. Then they were dismissed for bed. Severus rose quickly, hoping to catch Lily, but in the bedlam that ensued once the students were dismissed, it was nigh impossible, and he gave up and followed the Prefects down to the dungeons. After Lucius Malfoy gave the password—"family tree"—Severus followed his fellow fifth-years up to the dormitories, drowsily collapsing in his familiar emerald-hued four-poster bed. Full of good food and warmth from the crackling fireplaces, he undressed and piled blankets over him, welcoming a full night's sleep for the first time in months.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

****DISCLAIMER**: **These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: **Can I just say "wow"? I wasn't expecting so much positive feedback from one short chapter! I had no choice but to make more.

Severus awoke the next day feeling more refreshed than sleep had ever done for him. After a quick breakfast, the pair compared schedules and found, despite being in different Houses, they had several classes together that day. Lily's first class was History of Magic with the Ravenclaws, and then they had double Potions together.

"That's the worst Monday I've ever seen," commented Severus, looking at Lily's. "After potions, you've got Arithmancy… Binns and that boring numbers class in one day! Well, at least we'll have DADA together."

Lily smiled bracingly. "I like that 'boring numbers class.' Although, since it doesn't involve a cauldron or anything dead, it wouldn't much interest _you_, Severus…"

He returned her grin, and then lifted his bag more securely onto his shoulder. "I've got to get to Charms," Severus said reluctantly, setting off towards the third floor.

"See you in a bit, then!" called Lily. Severus raised one arm and waved without turning around.

Charms was much as usual, Professor Flitwick not wanting to worry them about their O.W.L.s just yet. At this point, he'd only been teaching for about six years or so, and was still fun-loving and lenient. Severus had never had a hard time with Charms, though it certainly wasn't an easy class. Today, he could barely focus: he would be seeing Lily soon.

After Charms let out, Severus hurried out of the room first, practically jogging down to the dungeons. As such, he arrived early, but Lily, perhaps the only student more skilled in the subject than he, had also arrived early. She raised an eyebrow at his disheveled appearance and shortness of breath, but couldn't help herself from smiling. Severus had run to see her.

Just then, Professor Slughorn arrived, smiling jovially at his two favorites. "Lily Evans!" he boomed, clapping her on the shoulder. "Had a good summer, I trust? And you, Severus?" Without waiting for their replies, he leaned in and whispered conspiratorially, "I'm having a little get together this weekend. You know, a 'welcome back' to a few _select _students… are you two game?"

Lily nodded, looking happy. When she'd first come here, she had been worried that, due to her heritage, she wouldn't be a very good student, but Professor Slughorn had been generous with his praise, and she deserved it.

"All good!" said Slughorn cheerfully. "What say you, Severus?"

Lily nudged her friend. "Oh, absolutely, Professor," he said at once. "Sounds like a good time. Expect to see us both."

With a final clap on the back for the pair of them, Professor Slughorn bustled to the front of the class, allowing them to take their seats at last. Of course Severus and Lily sat next to each other, front and center.

"Welcome back, students!" Professor Slughorn nearly shouted over the general din. "As you all know, you'll be taking your O.W.L.s this year…! Settle down, Stebbins, for goodness' sake…"

The class obeyed, taking their seats, Slytherins and Gryffindors entirely separated save for the pair of friends up front. Severus uncrossed his ankles, accidentally nudging Lily's foot, and was mortified to feel his face flush very slightly. He concentrated more firmly on Slughorn, who was overseeing the writing of a floating piece of chalk, listing the necessary ingredients.

"Today we will be mixing a potion commonly seen on the O.W.L. exams: the Draught of Peace. It's a curious brew, calms down anxiety quicker than you can say its name… however, be warned: if you are too generous with the ingredients, it can put the drinker into a deep and sometimes irreversible sleep.

"You'll find all you need in the store cupboard. Now, chop chop! Make me proud!" There was a flurry of movement as everyone stood in unison.

Severus put a hand on Lily's shoulder. "I'll get yours," he assured her. Without so much as a glance at the board, he set about gathering the necessary elements from the cupboard, doubling the amounts so as to get enough for Lily.

She smiled in thanks, taking the ingredients from him. Then with practiced movements, the pair simultaneously tied back their hair and rolled up their sleeves in preparation for potion-making.

To the ordinary sort, the Draught of Peace might be a desperately tricky potion to make. Unlike simpler brews, the ingredients had to be added in exactly the right order, as well as the right quantity down to the smallest units of solid and liquid measurement. Then the mixture had to be stirred precisely the correct amount of times, first clockwise, then counterclockwise. Finally, the flame under the cauldron had to be lowered to a certain height for a certain amount of minutes before the final ingredient was to be added.

However, to such talented potioneers as Severus Snape and Lily Potter, the preparation was no more than a light and enjoyable challenge.

With ten minutes to go, Slughorn announced to the classroom at large, "A light silver vapor should now be rising from the surface of your potions!" Severus heard someone swear loudly behind him, and he looked around.

At the table behind them sat James Potter and his trusty partner in crime Sirius Black. Sirus's potion was passable; James's however, was emitting prolific amounts of dark gray smoke. Severus realized immediately that Potter had forgotten to add syrup of hellebore, rendering his potion not only fatal to drink but also largely useless. There was, however, a simple way to remedy the error… perhaps, just this once, Severus would help the other boy.

"Potter."

"What do you want, Snivelly?" Potter snapped.

"You forgot to add—"

"I know what I bloody forgot to add, you greasy git. Keep your big nose out of my business."

Severus shrugged and turned back to his own potion to find Slughorn beaming at him. "As usual, Mr. Snape, you and Miss Evans hit the mark. Excellent work, you too."

Stepping back from their table, Slughorn announced to the class, "Those of you who have managed to brew an acceptable solution, bottle me a sample, label it with your name, and leave it on this table here for testing." As chairs scraped back and students began to speak, he raised his voice. "For homework, simply list the various uses of powdered moonstone in potion-making. Complete sentences will not be necessary."

Winking conspiratorially at Lily and Severus, he stage-whispered, "No homework for you two, as a reward for producing the only perfect potions today!" Lily thanked him, and the pair of them set about gathering their belongings and cleaning up the remnants of their ingredients.

"Not a bad lesson," Lily commented, sweeping stray grains of powdered moonstone into her palm, and then brushing her hands over the trash. "I nearly forgot to switch directions when I was stirring. How about you, Sev—?"

Just then, Severus yelped in surprise and pain as someone yanked quite hard on his ponytail. He wrenched his head free of the attacker, and then spun to see James Potter and Sirius Black grinning triumphantly. Peter Pettigrew and Remus Lupin seemed to have done the smart thing and gone to their next class.

"How's it goin', Snivellus?" Potter inquired innocently, tapping his wand on his thigh.

Severus, having finished packing his bag, sidestepped James, looking askance at Lily when she did not follow.

"Evans!" said Potter, his tone becoming pleasant. "How about you and me ditch next period and go—"

Lily looked down her ski-slope nose at him disdainfully. "I wouldn't go anywhere with you if you were the last boy on earth, you insufferable irritant," she declared. "C'mon, Sev. Let's get some lunch."

She set off at a brisk walk, Severus quick on her heels, rubbing his sore head.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

****DISCLAIMER**:** These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: **Here you'll find a tenderly close moment, a prank gone wrong, and a situation reversed. But rest assured, there will be drama!

The rest of that week sped by quite quickly, as the first week back was wont to do. Two invitations tied with fussy silk ribbons informed Lily and Severus that Professor Slughorn's first gathering was to be Saturday evening.

Saturday morning found Severus and Lily up before most of their peers, studying together at the Gryffindor house table. Even with Slughorn's favor, their work in preparation for O.W.L.s was taxing, not to mention classes they _didn't _excel in. In Lily's case, she was having a fair bit of trouble with Transfiguration, and Severus was experiencing difficulty in Charms. Little Flitwick didn't play favorites: Not that Severus was expecting him to, but the class was quickly becoming a challenge.

Thankfully for those two, Lily had a knack for Charms, and Severus was rather good at Transfiguration, and they were able to study together as a team.

Severus was leaning over Lily's Transfiguration essay, pointing with the nib of his quill to an error she had made, when he looked up to see if she was listening and found her intently examining him. Surprised, Severus leaned back and laughed nervously.

"What is it, Lily?" he asked her, rubbing his nose. "Have I got something on my face?"

Lily frowned quizzically and characteristically tipped her head to the side. "Wha—? No, Sev. Nothing like that."

Severus was becoming increasingly more awkward. "Then why were you staring at me and not this essay? Lily, if you want to get your O.W.L in this class, McGonagall requires at least a—"

Lily stuck her tongue out at his seriousness. "I was just thinking, Sev."

Severus blinked at his friend. "I'm going to guess you weren't thinking about Transfigur—"

"No, Sev, I was just thinking that your hair looks nice like that. Pulled back." She was smiling again.

Severus felt warmth flood his normally pallid cheeks, and he self-consciously put a hand to his ponytail. He always put it up when he was studying or working, not out of vanity but just so it didn't get in his way. "Are you being sarcastic?"

Lily shook her head. "Uh-uh. I think I like it better up."

Severus shook his head, nonplussed. "Uh, why? If you don't mind me asking."

Lily tilted her head to the side again, not out of confusion this time, Severus knew, but because she was trying to appear coy. "More face action."

Now Severus was _really _blushing. He then realized that they were almost entirely alone in the Great Hall, and they _were _alone at the Gryffindor table. "Lily, I…"

"Hey, look, it's Snivellus!"

Well, not _quite _alone.

Lily scowled over Severus's shoulder, and he turned wearily to face his tormentors. James Potter indeed stood there, left fist on his hip, right holding his wand by his side. He was flanked as ever by Black, Lupin, and Pettigrew, though admittedly Lupin and Pettigrew were seated and appeared to be studying.

Potter grinned at Severus maliciously. "Hey, Evans, what're you doing here with Snivelly? Telling him to wash his hair, I hope."

Lily wasn't having it today. She got to her feet and stood protectively in front of Severus. "Get lost, Potter."

Potter's grin widened. "Or what? You'll sic Snivellus on me? Yeah, I'm real scared. Evans, you're such a—"

But nobody got to hear exactly what he thought Lily Evans was, for at that moment she threw back her arm and punched Potter right in the jaw, sending him reeling. Sirius growled, hand going to his wand, but James held his arm out in front of his friend, restraining him.

Hand on his swollen jaw, Potter sneered at the snarl contorting Lily's delicate lips. "She's not worth it, Padfoot," he said condescendingly. "Neither of them is. C'mon."

He turned on his heel and strode away, Black following like the obedient dog he was. With a roll of his eyes, Remus stood. "Sorry about him, Evans," he said feebly, and then he left as well, Pettigrew scurrying along in his footsteps.

Satisfied, Lily sat back down next to her best friend. "Hopefully that will keep their lot away for awhile," she said, picking up her quill again. "Now, about the spelling of—" she stopped short when she caught sight of Severus's face. He was flushed, eyes downcast, and he seemed almost near tears.

"Wh-what is it, Sev?" she asked, concerned, brushing a rebellious lock of hair from his eyes. "Sev?"

He knocked her hand away. "I'm sick of you always defending me, Lily," he said, his voice quiet yet shaking with anger.

Her eyes widened and she scooted away from him. "Sev, don't be so sexist," she said gently. "Sometimes I defend you, sometimes you do it for me. We're friends. We're a team. Right?"

After a moment of stunned silence, Severus's face broke into a smile as he realized how very lucky he was to have a friend like Lily. "Yes, of course," he agreed, picking up his quill and relaxing. "I'm such an idiot sometimes."

Lily tucked her long red hair behind her ears and returned her attention to the parchment. "You're not an idiot," she murmured. "You've just got a bit of pride. Nothing wrong with that." She looked up at him through her dark red hair. "Now, which incantation did I misspell?"

Severus lowered his gaze from her face. "Um… let's see. Here, you misspelled 'Evanesco.' It's 'e-v-a,' not 'e-v-e.' Like your name, see?"

"Oh!" Lily scratched out the incorrect incantation and rewrote it. "Thank you, Sev! Now I'll remember that one for sure." She sighed, blowing her hair out of her eyes. "Vanishing spells are _hard_."

Severus nodded. "Mmh. Certainly, they're more difficult than Summoning Charms. But we're only on snails; wait till McGonagall switches us to mammals!"

"Mammals?" Lily pictured a tiny kitten, mewling in terror as she bore down on it, wand raised. "Wait, Vanished animals don't _die,_ do they?"

Severus laughed. "No, of course not."

"Then where do they _go_?"

A brisk female voice answered them. "Into nonbeing, which is to say, everything," said Minerva McGonagall. "And, Mr. Snape, you should head over to your own table now if you're planning on eating, as breakfast will be beginning shortly."

Severus jumped to his feet. "S-sorry, Professor!" he haphazardly tossed his things into his bag, offered Lily a small wave before departing for his House table.

Professor McGonagall gave Lily a rare smile before returning to the staff table, leaving the redhead somewhat put out. Not really in the mood for eating, she gathered her things and set off for the library, hoping to get a bit more work done.

Unfortunately, James Potter saw her leave from his position outside the Great Hall, and he Sirius Black followed.

~ ~ ~ page break * * *

Lily sat among the stacks of the library, breathing in the musty air. Here, she was in her element: Lily had always loved books. And though she had been to countless Muggle libraries as a child, and they all seemed magical to her at the time, no place had ever inspired such awe in her as the grand library of Hogwarts.

Glancing around to make sure nobody was watching her, Lily held the Transfiguration book from which she was working to her nose and gave it a sniff. It smelt of old parchment, and that peculiar, particular musky spice that seems to accompany all good books. Lily sighed contentedly.

"Evans?"

Lily jumped and nearly yelped, but regained her composure just in time. Unbeknownst to her, James Potter had crept up behind her. "And what is it you want?" Lily hissed, setting the book down.

"Just a friendly chat, that's all," James replied, taking the seat next to her.

Lily shook her head, scooting her chair away from his with a grating scrape. "What did you want to talk about?"

~ ~ ~ page break * * *

"Ow-OW! Black, let me go!" Severus howled, putting his hands to his head.

Sirius merely pulled harder on the shorter boy's ponytail. "Shut up, Snivelly, this is a library." He released Severus and grasped his shoulder. "James and I are going to let you in on a little secret," he whispered. "Shut the hell up and come with me."

Severus should have known better than to trust Sirius, but he followed anyway. They crept along the shelves until they heard voices, and Sirius bade him stop.

The first voice belonged to James Potter. "Why do you hang around Snivelly all the time? You can't seriously like a nothing like him."

"Don't call him that." This voice was Lily Evans's, and Severus faintly glowed with pride at hearing her defend him. "He's not nothing. I hang around him because we're friends. _Best_ friends."

James gave a low laugh. "No, seriously, Evans. Is it because you feel sorry for him?"

Lily responded with a small laugh of her own. "I don't feel sorry for him. I feel sorry for _me, _really. He's more intelligent than I am, and he's always helping me with work."

Severus had realized what was going on. Potter and Black had set this up, clearly thinking that Lily was going to denounce Severus if she didn't know he was listening. Their little prank seemed to have backfired.

Hearing Lily's praise for his hated rival, James seemed beyond words. "But, Evans, he's—doesn't even play Quidditch—have you seen the way he looks at you? He _fancies_ you, Evans. It's pathetic, Slytherin scum like him—you deserve—"

"_I _deserve?" Severus could practically hear her eyebrows rising. "Don't tell me what _I_ deserve, Potter. _Severus_ deserves much better than me, and I'd be honored if what you said is true. You disgust me." Severus's heart leapt.

James gave a desperate laugh, and then made his fatal error, muttering, "Yeah, as if I… arrogant little Mubdlood." Severus and Black heard his chair scrape back. The sudden noise seemed loud in the silence of the library, but it was nothing compared to the echoing _bang_ when Lily threw her own chair to the floor.

Black muttered a curse and fled with his tail between his legs as James came sprinting between the stacks, dodging hex after hex that Lily sent wordlessly at him. Severus stayed put, crouched near the bottom shelves, listening intently.

He could hear Lily panting, out of breath, and knew she was straining her ears for Madam Pince's scuttling gait. She must have heard that commotion….

When several minutes passed, Lily seemed to deem it safe to sheathe her wand in an inside pocket, heave her chair off the floor, and go back to work. Severus, for his part, silently stole back to the entrance of the library, then turned around and walked back in, this time slapping his feet louder than usual so as to be heard.

When he arrived at Lily's winged armchair, he set his bag down, leaned around it, and smiled at his friend. She jumped a little and gasped: Lost in books as she was, she had not heard him, despite his stomping.

"Sev! You gave me a start; I thought you were—geez. Have a seat!" She indicated the chair that Potter had recently vacated. Severus took it, not removing his eyes from her. They settled into studying as if they had never been interrupted, leaving Severus to wonder.

Had Lily truly meant that she would be honored if he wanted her, or was she merely saying that to get James off her back? If it was the former, it would be wise for Severus to take action now; however, if it was the latter, any hasty actions would alienate her. Severus decided that the best policy would be to, without her knowing, coax Lily into admitting any possible affection for him.

"Hey… Lily?"

"Mmh?" she said without looking up from her Transfiguration essay.

"You know…" he cleared his throat. "I heard James Potter fancies you." Saying the name no longer invoked that deepest loathing in him, for he was above Potter now that he knew Lily did not fancy the other boy.

Lily laughed. "Yes, I heard that too."

Severus paused to revise a poorly worded statement in his own Charms homework. "And?"

Lily glanced up at him, sucking on the tip of her quill. "And, what?"

Severus broke eye contact and looked back to his work. "Do you."

Lily laughed, lightly punching her friend on the shoulder. "Spit it out, Sev!"

He winced. "Do you fancy him back?"

Lily stared at Severus for a moment, her eyes wide. Then she ducked her head down, shoulders shaking.

Alarmed, Severus put a hand to her shoulder. "Lily, don't cry! I—"

She raised her head, grinning at him. "I'm not crying, Sev, I'm laughing! You're so ridiculous sometimes. No, I don't fancy Potter."

Severus slumped down in his chair, relieved. "So you two aren't going to go out?"

This nearly sent Lily into hysterics again. "God, no! Not even if he was the last boy on earth. Besides, I fancy someone else."

Severus jumped as though he'd been electrocuted. "What? Lil—"

But just then, the bell rang for lunch and Lily, smiling mischievously, darted between the shelves and was gone, leaving Severus to gather up his things.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

****DISCLAIMER**:** These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: **Still no reviews ;~; so either you have nothing to complain about, or you hate it beyond words. Well either way, this is something I really enjoy writing, so I'm probably going to keep going anyway.

Lily evaded Severus's searching looks for most of the lunch hour, instead chatting animatedly with her friends. After lunch, however, the two met up again to discuss the Slug Club party that was to be that evening. Lily seemed determined not to mention their conversation earlier.

"I doubt it's a dress-up occasion, that's more for the Christmas party, I think. Also that's usually the one we take formal dates to. I hope he has it again this year, that was so much fun! We went together, didn't we, Sev?"

Severus smiled at the memory. "Mmh." He was walking Lily back to her dormitory after a rather late-running lunch. Removing his hair tie from around his wrist and placing it between his lips for temporary safekeeping, he gathered his hair in his hands, removed the hair tie from his mouth, and tied his hair back. Lily smiled at him.

Once they reached the portrait of the Fat Lady, Lily took both his hands in both of hers, looking seriously into his eyes. "Sev, wait here, I just want to drop my bag off. Then we can spend the whole evening together, yeah?"

Severus inclined his head, then settled into position, leaning against a wall to wait for her, arms akimbo. After giving the password—"akimbo"—Lily clambered through the hole, calling back, "I'll just be a second!"

Severus reached into his own bag and pulled out his copy of _Advanced Potion Making_, leafing through to his most recent spell. _Sectumsempra. For enemies. _Only one countercurse, and he had invented that as well. It felt good to be powerful, to have a secret weapon just in case.

The portrait swung open, signaling Lily's return. Grinning to himself, Severus returned the book to his bag and turned, meaning to take her hand. However, he never got that far: She slipped, the toe of her trainer catching on the inside of the hole, and her torso pitched forward, helpless to stop her stomach from falling painfully onto the edge of the portrait hole.

Dropping his bad, Severus tumbled forward, catching Lily by the shoulders just in time. Gently, he pushed upwards on her collarbones, helping her to her feet. Taking his hand, she stepped carefully over the edge. "That almost ended pretty badly," said Lily, laughing at her own clumsiness. "Thanks, Sev!"

He nodded, feeling fire warm his face when she did not let go of his hand. "Wh-where do you want to spend the evening? That is, until the party."

Lily considered this. "Well, maybe we could go put your bag away, then I don't know, spend a little time outside before it starts to become colder?"

Severus agreed, and the pair set off towards the dungeons. He couldn't stop smiling; Lily still had not relinquished his hand.

Once they neared the dungeons, however, this small joy became problematic. When they saw his friends, like Rosier, Avery, and Mulciber, his fellow Slytherins snickered at him, holding hands with a Muggle-born. Severus drew Lily close to him and together they pretended not to hear the whispered slurs, much like the one Potter had uttered earlier.

But ignoring them didn't ease the tight frown on Lily's face.

At the blank stretch of wall that led to the Slytherin common room, Severus gave the password and Lily stood dutifully outside as he dashed upstairs, dumped his bag, and managed a quick spritz of cologne before running back down the stairs.

Lily was waiting, eyes on her trainers, but she looked up and smiled, holding out her hand again. Severus wondered whether she actually wanted to be close to him, or if she merely wanted some protection against these Slytherin goons.

Once they were clear of the dungeons, Lily looked up at Severus through her lashes. "Sev?"

"Mmh?"

"Can we visit the Owlery? I want to post a letter to my parents."

Severus nodded. "But Lily, it's not post. It's _owl _post here."

She laughed. He was using humor to cover the sting of reality: he did not get letters from home, and so had none to send. But being bitter about it certainly wouldn't make anything better.

So the pair climbed the long stone staircase up to the Owlery, Lily wrapping her scarf more securely against the wind. Despite it only being September, it was already beginning to get cold after the sun began to sink.

Noticing Lily's discomfort, Severus released her hand and removed his own thin jacket, placing it on her shoulders, ignoring her protests. "I'm not cold," he assured her, and she wrapped his jacket snugly around her arms, smiling in thanks.

Trying to make conversation, Severus asked, "So, what did your parents write about?"

Lily laughed. "The usual stuff. Questions. They never have enough questions. This time they were curious about immortality."

They weren't the only ones. Severus looked askance at his friend. "And? What did you tell them?"

Lily looked skyward and shrugged. "Everything I know about it… which is next to nothing, really."

"Oh?"

"Mmh. It's not something we cover in average lessons, is it? If it is possible, it's dangerous information in the wrong hands."

"And if it isn't possible?"

"Well…" Lily spread her palms. "I don't think it is. Nobody needs to live forever; the whole reason a life is valuable is that it's temporary."

Severus nodded. "You're right," he told her. "You're always right."

She laughed again, and Severus blinked slowly, finding joy in the sound. "No, not always." Her fingers found his again, wrapping around tightly, and he was dismayed to find how cold hers were.

They at last reached the Owelry, and Lily located her mellow-tempered barn owl, Oliver. He had been a tentative first "wizard gift" from her parents. Unsure of what sort of gift was appropriate for the beginning of Lily's O.W.L year, her parents had surreptitiously asked her best friend Severus, who replied that an owl was a common pet for both young and adult wizards. The reason they agreed with his choice was because it would allow them to contact their daughter.

Coaxing the bird down from his perch and onto her forearm, Lily held her arm out to Severus, allowing him to securely tie the letter to Oliver's leg.

"Go home, okay, Ollie?" The bird blinked his wide, dark eyes once, and then took off out the nearest window. Lily leaned on the ledge, watching him go.

"They're so pretty," she sighed.

Severus stood next to her, eyes also on the sky. "Owls?"

"Birds of prey in general." For the third time that day, Lily held out her hand, and Severus gladly twined his fingers around hers.

"Oh, I don't know; I think I prefer the cool stuff."

Lily raised an eyebrow. "'Cool stuff'?"

Severus laughed. "Magical beings. Chimeras, centaurs, phoenixes, unicorns."

Lily frowned slightly. "I disagree."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I think that Muggles have it better in that area. Wizards don't get fairy tales; real life is a fairytale. It takes the wonder about it. Stuff like unicorns and fairies, stuff that Muggle children get to make up their own rules about, the wizarding world reduces to a science."

Severus could see what she meant, having nearly grown up a Muggle himself due to his own father's hatred of magic. "Give me an example."

"Well, real fairies are quite vain, aren't they?"

"Yes, they'll even allow themselves to be used as decoration. We use them on the Christmas trees here."

"Exactly! As a child, I made believe that fairies were benevolent and sweet, and their spit could heal wounds. And unicorns ate rainbows. I could decide anything I wanted, because there were no rules. Nothing's as fun when it has rules."

Severus laughed again. "Do I sense a budding rebel?"

Lily smiled and turned to her friend. "Yeah, Sev, you know me. Such a troublemaker. Always in detention."

"No, that'd be…" Severus suddenly realized how close they were—how _alone_—and decided not to mention James Potter. In fact, he decided it would be best not to mention anything at all.

Lily, seeming to agree with this silent decision, didn't pursue the end to his unfinished statement. Instead she just looked up at him with those vivid, doe-like eyes, sniffling once in the brisk autumn air.

And then, without quite knowing precisely why, Severus leaned down very slightly and softly kissed his best friend.

Her reaction was slow in coming, but genuine. Lily Evans snaked her arms around Severus's neck, responding eagerly to his advances. After what seemed like quite awhile, but could only really have been a couple of minutes, the two broke apart.

"Was—was that okay?" Severus asked anxiously. "I mean, I've never exactly done that before."

Lily touched her lips and smiled. "Mmh. It was more than okay, Sev."

Severus made no move to kiss her again, shy and insecure as he was; he didn't want to annoy her, or disgust her. "Erm, well, it's nearly six, now—shall we—?

He was about to suggest that they head down to Slughorn's party, which was due to start at six, but she interrupted him by softly pressing her mouth to hers. Basically unable to resist, Severus concentrated on pulling her as close as humanly possible. Laughing, Lily pulled away. "You're right, Sev, we should get down there," she murmured. "To be continued?"

She made towards the staircase, but Severus caught her by the elbow and turned her back around. "Wait, Lily…"

"What is it, Severus?"

"Does this mean… we're like…" he was blushing furiously. "Going together?"

Lily took his hand. "If you'll have me," she said sweetly. Severus just nodded fervently, and the two set off for the dungeons, fingers laced tighter than wicker.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

****DISCLAIMER**:**These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: **The reviews! Oh my goodness I was practically squealing! Thank you all so much :3 I hope I continue to please.

Professor Slughorn greeted them buoyantly at the door, ushering them inside. "You're late, Lily, Severus," he chortled good-naturedly. He took in Severus's still-flushed face, Lily's slightly disheveled hair, and their still-clutching hands and winked.

They were a bit late, and the dinner had begun. After Professor Slughorn took his seat, the only remaining ones were conveniently beside each other, and Lily and Severus took them, trying not to interrupt a story being told by a seventh-year Gryffindor about his rather wealthy late grandfather. Being poor, of unimportant background, and, in Lily's case, Muggle-born, neither she nor Severus knew any of the other students.

"…And if you'll believe it, Professor," the boy was saying, "The cheap bastard left all of it to my father and not a single Knut to my uncle!"

Professor Slughorn laughed boomingly. "Well, Donoghue, I can't say I'm surprised. You father has made many noteworthy magical accomplishments, while I don't think I've heard of your uncle at all!"

The boy laughed as well, digging into his shepherd's pie. He started to say something else around his full mouth, but at that moment the door banged open. "Sorry I'm late, Professor," came an unmistakable drawl.

Sure enough, Severus glanced over his shoulder to see James Potter, eyeing the full table. "Not to worry, my dear boy," said Slughorn, standing and taking out his wand. "I'll find you a seat." He outlined the basic shape of a chair in midair, and an overstuffed chintz armchair fell into place among its occupied fellows, directly to Lily's right. She groaned inwardly.

Slughorn began interrogating a rather pretty Ravenclaw sixth-year girl, and James took that moment to engage Lily in whispered conversation. Severus squeezed her hand nervously, wishing he could hear them.

"Hey, Evans."

"Nip it, Potter."

"No, really. Hear me out."

Lily was silent, but gave Severus's hand an urgent clench.

"I get it, you and Sniv—I mean, Snape—are going out now. Message received."

Curious, Lily relaxed her stranglehold on Severus's hand, though not completely releasing it, and made eye contact with James for the first time.

James smiled slightly. "I mean it. Sirius and I will leave him alone now. I realize I was being kind of arrogant before, assuming you'd fancy me without even asking."

Lily rolled her eyes and snorted, attracting curious looks from both Severus and Professor Slughorn. "You're a genius, aren't you, Potter?"

James rolled his eyes as well. "Yeah, I know. Well, I'm sorry, and you can tell Sniv—Snape—that, as well."

"You can tell him yourself!" Lily hissed so loudly that Professor Slughorn could no longer pretend to ignore them.

"Miss Evans? Mr. Potter? Is there a problem?"

The former stood. "Oh, no, Professor," she assured him. "I was just informing Potter of what an arrogant prat he can be. But no worries, he's apologized.

She walked over to the door and half-turned back. "Anyway, it's nearly eight, and I've still got your essay to finish. I'd best be off." She departed, leaving Severus, James and Slughorn with bemused expressions. Hesitantly, Severus stood, nearly tripping on the hem of his robes.

"I should probably go too, Professor," he stammered. "Charms homework—lots to do—you understand." He fled the room, thoughts focused on Lily and the various secluded places where they might enjoy some private time.

**A/N: **I know this is a bit short, but it's 5 AM and I've got a job interview in five hours. And I wanted to have SOMETHING for you guys. Hey, how about you give me suggestions for plot twists in your reviews? Or, suggest an idea/theme for a oneshot/drabble you'd like to see! I'd really appreciate it, I'm at a creative dead-end recently.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

A/N: Oh my goddess. The reviews. I have the best readers on the planet.

I got a lot of great suggestions as to how to continue this story, but I think I'm going to take the one requesting I make James less of a bad guy; Lupin says he matures up in seventh year, and he died to protect his wife and kid. I mean, c'mon. He's clearly not evil. But I like exploring the idea that you can be more than your House. There are brave Hufflepuffs, such as Nymphadora Tonks. There are cowardly Gryffindors, like Peter Pettigrew. There are some seriously stupid Ravenclaws, such as Gilderoy Lockhart (although it is arguable that his use of Memory Charms to gain fame was a bit cunning—cunning like a Slytherin!). And there are some brave, loving Slytherins, such as my hero, Severus Snape. Just as age, race, gender identity, blood status, religion, and salad dressing preference do not define or limit who you are, neither can your House.

Okay. I'm done being preachy.

_He stood on a hilltop, cold and forlorn in the darkness. He was turning in helpless circles, clutching his wand, waiting for something. He was breathing heavily, grasping at his chest, drowning without water. What was he waiting for? What was he so afraid of?  
>Then a spell flew over him, through him, blindingly white and jagged as lightning. Feeling his wand forsake him for the darkness, Severus dropped to his knees. <em>

"_Don't kill me!"_

"_That was not my intention," the ancient voice replied gravely. Headmaster Dumbledore emerged from the darkness, holding Severus's wand in one hand and his own, aloft, in the other. _

_Severus's vision blurred and faded for several moments, the sound with it, sounding like a bad radio. Eventually, his senses cleared and he was on the hilltop once more. _

"…_he thinks it means Lily Evans!" Severus was shouting against the wind. "…he is going to hunt her down—kill them all—" Severus was in tears now. Strange, considering he had no idea what he was talking about. Someone was hunting down… Lily? No… he would not let that happen…._

"_Keep her—them—safe," he croaked. "Please."_

"_And what will you give me in return, Severus?"_

_Severus gaped at Dumbledore, wondering why he had to even ask. For Lily? "Anything." _

The next day was a Sunday, and Severus woke late to an empty dormitory. He lay in bed for several long moments, clutching at the dregs of his nightmare. A hilltop… Headmaster Dumbledore… Lily?

But it was no use; he may as well have been clutching at an orb of polished granite, slick with oil. The more he tried to keep it, the faster is escaped. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he headed down to breakfast, hoping there were some blueberry pancakes left—they were his favorite.

However, his path was curtailed by none other than James Potter, standing just outside the Slytherin common room. Severus raised an eyebrow and attempted to pass, but James stepped in front of him, blocking the way.

"Potter."

"Snape."

"Can I help you?"

James sighed. "I realize I've been somewhat of a prat for the past, erm—"

"Five years?"

James rolled his eyes. "Yeah. I'm apologizing."

Severus's eyebrows were in danger of vanishing into his hairline. "You mean, you're sorry for assigning me cruel nicknames, and bewitching objects to chase me down corridors, and setting my homework on fire, and pushing me down stairs, and using my own spells against me, and shoving me in the hallways, and throwing my books down, and every other senseless act of violence you've forced me to endure?"

Severus heard a short, barking laugh from behind him, and didn't have to turn around to recognize Sirius Black. "He said we're sorry, Snape," reasoned Black, stepping into view. "Let it go. Water under the bridge, eh?"

Severus shook his head. "Whatever you say. Black, Potter," he inclined his head to both of them. "You and your little Marauders stay away from Evans and I. I know what Lupin is, and I know where you go every night."

Sirius straightened his shoulders. "Is that a threat, Snivelly?"

"No, it's a fact. Just know I'll be _dogging _your footsteps, all of you. I'm not going to start trouble out of nowhere, but if you move against me, I will fight back."

For once, Potter and Black kept quiet, and Severus sidestepped them and continued on his way. His hopes of porridge long gone, Severus now had one thing on his mind: Lily.

The tattered remnants of his nightmare lad instilled in him an awful sort of panic. He was worried he might never see her again. He was worried some harm was soon to befall her. Though he did not know it, he was feeling the panic often felt when one at last obtained something that they have wanted dearly.

Now that he had been given a taste of happiness, now that he had finally gotten that which he had coveted for so long, Severus was, subconsciously, scared to live without Lily.

His eyes roved over the Gryffindor House table, but she was nowhere to be found. Frowning, Severus turned and made to exit the hall, but found his path blocked for the second time that day, this time by a plain-faced Gryffindor fifth-year he vaguely recognized as being one of Lily's dorm mates.

"Snape," she sniffed.

Confused, he stopped to talk to her. "Mary MacDonald, right?"

She nodded, and for the first time he noticed that there were tears in her eyes, snarls in her hair, and mud smeared across her face. "Could you help me with something, Severus?"

"What is it?"

"Well, you're going with Lily now, but you're also friends with—with those awful Slytherin boys, so I thought maybe you could help me out… a couple of boys did a cruel thing to me, and perhaps you'd like to sort them out?"

"Who?"

"You know who—those three, Avery, Rosier, Mulciber. Though it was really mostly Mulciber." She lifted her chin towards the doors. "I'll take you to them."

Wordlessly, he followed her outside onto the lawns of Hogwarts. Despite yesterday's cold, the air was still passably warm. MacDonald led him to the shores of the Black Lake, twenty feet away but no closer to a large tree, under which sat his friends Rosier, Avery and Mulciber. She pointed at them.

"There. Those three." She folded her arms sullenly.

"What did they do?"

MacDonald reddened and tugged at her skirt. "They used some—some awful spell to… turn me upside down, and…" She lowered her voice to near-silence. "Have a look at my knickers."

Severus, angry at both the fact that she was Lily's friend and the fact that they had used his own spell, set off towards the three boys. MacDonald stayed behind, watching.

"Avery," he said bravely. "Mulciber."

"Snape!" said Mulciber cheerfully. "Didya hear what we did to that stupid Mud—"

Severus shook his head. "You shouldn't call anyone that."

Rosier's face contorted with disgust. "Well, we all know Snape's a Mudblood-lover," he said dismissively. "But anyone with half a brain knows that all they deserve's dirt."

Severus couldn't believe that anyone could be so foul. "I want you to apologize to Mary MacDonald," he said forcefully, trying to hide his fear. They were many and he was few, though he was an adept spellcaster. He slid his hand into his pocket, grasping the handle of his wand.

The trio broke into raucous laughter at this. "Apologize to filth?" chortled Mulciber. "Next you'll be wanting us to apologize to a fly for killing it!" He stood, jabbing Severus in the chest with his index finger. "Severus, we used to think you're cool, but now—"

Severus cut him off. Without even removing his wand from his pocket, he flicked it upwards, focusing his thoughts on the incantation. _Levicorpus! _

With a yelp, Mulciber was hoisted into the air by his ankle. "Aw, c'mon, Sev, cut it out!" he yelled, trying to tug his robes down. "It was only a laugh, that's all—"

Flicking his wand again, Severus tossed Mulciber into the Black Lake. Laughing, Rosier and Avery stood and helped pull him out as Mulciber sputtered indignantly.

Severus turned and walked back towards Mary, who was now grinning. "You'll pay for this, Snape!" Mulciber shouted, even as Avery said, "it was just a laugh, Mulciber. Forget it."

Mary was positively beaming. "Thanks, Severus," she said, and then hurried to a knot of her friends near the doors. Noticing Lily among them, Severus followed.

Face lit by a smile, Lily hurried towards her best friend. "Sev, that was so brave!" she murmured, throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her forehead against his. Pulling away and holding him at arm's length, she gazed trustingly up at him.

A chorus of giggling issued from her circle of friends. Rolling her eyes, Lily called, "that's enough, guys!" She took Severus's hand and tugged him towards the castle. "You haven't eaten yet, right? I'm sure we can convince the house elves to give us some leftover blueberry hotcakes—your favorite, right?"

**A/N: **A couple of you requested more LilyxSnape moments, but the truth is… I don't like writing about sex! Or even kissing, really! So if you're just here for smut, you can clear off! I draw the line at wholesome romance!


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

****DISCLAIMER**:**These are Ms. Rowling's toys, and I'm just playing with them. I promise I'll put them back when I'm done!

**A/N: **Not a lot of reviews on the last chapter yet. Bummer! Was it because I said I don't want to write sex scenes? I'll do it, if it's what the readers want! Just say the word.

Also, I know I don't focus much on their lessons. That's because school is boring, even magical school.

Also, since nobody ever says how you make Amortentia, I made it up.

~ * ~ pagebreak

Several months later, having awoken randomly in the wee hours of the morning, Severus laid half-awake, drowsing, warmed by his own happiness.

Severus Snape loved Lily Evans.

That was the truest statement about him.

He loved her from her freckles to her laugh, from her knuckles to her favorite colour. He loved her eyebrows, loved making them arch in amusement. He loved her hands, loved holding them. He loved her mouth and the way it tasted.

Fifteen years old or no, he loved her with every fiber of his slight being.

And now, finally, she loved him back.

And, perhaps most wondrous of all, she was slowly causing him to love himself.

Love his hands when she held them.

His hair when she combed through it with her long fingers and tied it back for him.

His name when she sighed it.

_Lily. _

~ * ~ peagebreak

_As Severus slipped into his dreams, he heard an awful keening, like that of a wounded animal. _

"_I thought… you were going… to keep her… safe…." Severus was slumped forward in a chair in the Headmaster's office, making the horrible sounds. _

"_She and James put their faith in the wrong person," replied Dumbledore, and Severus was enraged to hear the calm in his voice. "Rather like you, Severus…."_

_The dream faded into static for many moments before returning. Nothing had changed. _

"_You remember the shape and colour of Lily Evans's eyes, I presume?" Dumbledore was asking. _

_What a stupid question… as if he could ever forget…. Severus's agony buckled his shoulders. "DON'T!" he bellowed, not wishing to hear the Headmaster, not wanting to think of her, drowning in the pain of wanting her to exist once more. "Gone… dead…"_

"_Is this remorse, Severus?"_

"_I wish… I wish _I _were dead…."_

"_And what use would that be to anyone?" said Dumbledore coldly. And then the dream changed. While previously, the only colours had been black and grey and the sickly blue of a drowned man's face, warmth suddenly flooded into the scene. The cold fires of the candles became realistically hot; the room's leeched colours returned to it, and to Dumbledore's face, but not Severus's. _

_Dumbledore leaned forward, his long fingers steepled, his face grave. "If you love Lily Evans, if you truly love her, then your way forward is clear," he said urgently. "Live on. Save her from what may be, and save yourself from this misery."_

_Severus shook his head, bewildered and lost, just a teenaged boy who loved too fiercely and too much. _

_~ * ~ pagebreak_

Severus gasped and bolted upright as if lightning had struck him, breathing hard. Dawn was just barely peeking over the horizon, and the other boys in the dormitory were fast asleep, their dreams unfettered with thoughts of death and fate.

The nightmares were getting worse, and Severus was remembering more and more of them. What was more, they were leaving him with increasingly awful emotions. Why would Headmaster Dumbledore… be talking about Lily…? Why did Severus suddenly fear for her life…? And why, oh why, did he keep waking in such mental agony?

Shaking his head, Severus put the dreams behind him; they were just dreams, after all. They didn't mean anything, and they certainly couldn't hurt him.

Besides, today he needed his wits about him; it was the last day before Christmas break and, as a challenge to the fifth-year Potions class, Professor Slughorn was having them brew a potion he ordinarily did not even introduce until sixth-year. Conveniently (not wanting to give Snape and Evans, potioneers extraordinaire, a chance to prepare), Slughorn had not revealed the potion's identity.

After Severus left Charms, he walked quickly up several staircases, whipped through a shortcut passage, and met Lily just outside her History of Magic classroom.

"Sev!" she said, her voice happily surprised. "You sure got here fast." After a chaste kiss planted neatly on his jaw (she had to stand on tiptoe, even—he was getting so _tall_!), she squeezed his hand and they set off for the dungeons. "You ready for the tricky mystery potion, Severus?"

He laughed, carelessly rubbing the stubble along his jawline. "I'm sure it won't be anything too difficult," he reasoned.

When they were just about to exit the corridor leading to the landing of the great marble staircase, Severus suddenly stopped walking and released Lily's hand, peering at the ceiling. He was sure he'd heard a cracking sound…. Oblivious, Lily walked on. Right then, Severus lashed out at her, seizing her wrist and wrenching her towards him, tucking her safely against his chest.

"Ow—Severus, what—?" she cried. His suspicious proved correct less than a second later—a wide chunk of the corridor's ceiling fell in, directly where Lily had been about to walk.

Relapsing Lily, Severus cautiously stepped forward, peering up the hole. He met eyes with a dozen sixth-years, who had apparently been practicing the spell _Deprimo_—a spell primarily used to soften or detach objects—in the Charms classroom above them. Professor Flitwick peered over the gap, apparently shocked.

"Goodness, Mr. Snape, Miss Evans—was either of you hurt?" he squeaked, brushing dust off his miniature cloak.

"No, Professor," replied Lily, her voice shaky. "I—shall I go fetch Mr. Filch, to help you clean up?"

"Not to worry, I can sort it out myself," replied the Charms professor. "You two had better hurry to your next class!"

A small smile playing on his lips, Severus waved to Professor Flitwick, and the pair continued on their way. ""Merlin's beard," breathed Lily, amusing Severus with her use of the Wizard slang. "That was close! How did you know the ceiling was about to fall in?"

Severus peered down at her, looking nonplussed. "I didn't," he replied. "I heard a crack, looked up, and saw it as it was about to happen," he stated simply. His words betrayed the bravery within him. He did not, however, mention that the horrible sense of foreboding his nightmares gave him caused him to be on the alert for danger constantly.

Lily's eyes were wide. "Wow," she said softly.

"What's the look for?"

"I almost died," she said, awe tingeing her voice. "But you saved me."

Severus chuckled. "It's not like I fought off demons with a sword or anything," he said, feigning exasperation. Secretly, he was pleased—she thought he was _brave…._

At last, they reached the Potions classroom unscathed, and they weren't even late arriving. "Miss Evans!" Professor Slughorn called from his desk. "Mr. Snape! Would you care to step forward?"

Weaving their way between their fellow students, the two approached Slughorn's desk, eyeing the small pewter cauldron he had set up there. "I suppose you both know what this is?"

Lily glanced at Severus, who was standing with his eyes closed, inhaling deeply. She returned her gaze to Professor Slughorn. "Amortentia."

Slughorn beamed at her. "Right you are, dear. Would you care to repeat that, along with an explanation, once class starts?" With a fervent nod, Lily dragged a reluctant Severus to his seat.

Slughorn faced the class and clapped his hands. "Settle down!" he called. "You'll want all the time you can get, today!" At this, the class fell into abrupt silence; many were worried about this surprise potion he had sprung upon them.

Gesturing to the cauldron on his desk, Slughorn approached Lily. "Miss Evans, could you tell us what this particular potion is?"

"Amortentia," said Lily again, this time loud enough for all to hear.

"And what does it do?"

"It's the most powerful love potion invented," she replied, then amended herself: "Well, no… no potion can _create_ love… it merely creates a powerful obsession."

"Very good, take ten points to Gryffindor. And does anyone know the most unusual characteristic of this particular 'love' potion?"

Severus raised his hand and, after an encouraging nod from Slughorn, began hesitantly. "Well… it's supposed to smell differently to each individual person, depending on what scents are associated with… happy memories." When Slughorn did not interrupt, he continued. "For example, I smell the woods by my childhood home, and stargazer lilies, and…" but his face coloured, and he stopped speaking. Lily squeezed his hand under the table.

Ignoring his discomfort, Slughorn boomed, "Right you are, my dear boy, take ten points for Slytherin." Turning to the class, he spread his arms wide. "Your task is to produce this potion—" he reached into his waistcoat, pulled out a heavy gold pocket watch, and checked the time— "in the time we have left, which is a little over an hour. Now, hop to it!"

Severus stood, pushing back her chair with a scrape. "I'll get our ingredients," he assured Lily, and then walked over to the store cupboard.

Unlike their usual daily lessons, when Severus replied solely on his memory, for this potion he checked and double-checked every item on the board, not wanting to mess up such a tricky potion.

Having gathered the ingredients, Severus returned to the table and set Lily's half of the ingredients beside her cauldron. Seeing her nervous expression, he smiled bracingly at her.

Without speaking, the two got to work, both trying their hair back and rolling up their sleeves.

The potion required a number of rare ingredients, such as powdered moonstone, crushed unicorn horn, and had to be brewed the day before a full moon—which Slughorn had planned ahead for. Curiously, it was a rather gemstone-heavy potion, requiring not just moonstone but also trace amounts of amber, lapis lazuli, and rose quartz.

Half an hour into the lesson, Lily was bent over her cauldron, trying desperately to remove the extra moth wings she had added on accident. "Severus, I—how do I—?"

Putting a hand on her shoulder, Severus reached over and, using a pair of forceps, carefully plucked out several pairs of the dusty silver-brown wings, then tossed them into the trash. Lily sighed. "Thanks, Sev."

"No problem," he replied, adding the next ingredient—a sprig of mint leaves—to the potion for her, seeing that she had the wrong thing in her hand. She smiled gratefully.

With fifteen minutes to go, both Severus's and Lily's potions had the distinctive mother-of-pearl sheen of Amortentia, as well as the steam rising in characteristic spirals. Smirking, the couple exchanged a small high-five in victory.

Through the haze of steam and smoke now rising in the dungeon, Professor Slughorn peered over the lip of Severus's cauldron, then Lily's, an incredulous grin slowly spreading across his wide face.

"I shouldn't be surprised," he said, beaming at the pair of them, "and yet I am. Able to complete an N.E.W.T. potion in fifth-year… well done, the both of you. Thirty points each to your respective houses."

Lily sighed in relief, leaning back in her seat. "I actually did it, Sev," she said happily. "But only 'cause you rescued my potion."

Severus shrugged. "It's not like you actually made a mistake, or got the wrong ingredient," he reasoned. "Your finger slipped. Not your fault." She smiled gratefully. Leaning forward again, she put her face nearly to the surface of her potion, drinking in the smell.

Severus eyed her curiously. "What are you doing?"

She sighed. "It's heavenly. Magic is so wonderful."

He smiled. "What d'you smell?"

She closed her eyes. "Homemade soup that my mom always used to make," she began. "And then that smell you get when you're near the sea… my parents used to take us on vacations there, when we were little. And…" She turned a bit pink. "What about you? You only gave Slughorn the first two."

Stalling, Severus muttered, "You only gave _me _the first two." But then he smiled. "You have to ask?"

She watched him for a moment as he breathed in the steam from his owl cauldron. "Are you going to answer?"

With some reluctance, he looked back at her and smiled. "No."

At the end of class, Slughorn called the two of them up to his desk once more, a familiar smile upon his face. "As both of you know," he began in his usual wheezy way, "today is the last day of term before we break for the winter holidays."

Inwardly, Severus was smiling; he knew what was coming.

"So," Slughorn continued, "I've already sent out invitations to my usual Christmas bash… but I assumed that, as I'd be seeing both of you today, I could deliver yours personally."

A smile danced across Lily's face as Slughorn reached into his pocket and pulled out two rolls of parchment, tied with his signature red silk ribbons. Severus accepted his, as did Lily, and they tucked them away in their robes.

"You can count on seeing us, Professor," said Severus, his tone uncharacteristically cheery. Lily nodded in agreement, and then the heavyset Potions master waved them off, saying he had work to do.

~ ~ ` &^%*(*

**A/N: **I really liked writing this chapter. Oh, and be warned: sometime in the future, there will be sex. Not gross, graphically detailed sex, I'm only going to kind of hint at it.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**A/N: **Just so you guys know, I may or may not be getting a job in a couple days, depending on how my interview went. If I get it, less updates sorry! Also, school is starting in less than two weeks, so WAY less updates then, I'm taking a few honors/AP classes. Just bear with me, because I WILL find the time to update!

P.S.: This photo breaks my heart: this dumb link had better work ..com/tumblr_lpghrpdhC31qakrlwo1_?AWSAccessKeyId=AKIAJ6IHWSU3BX3X7X3Q&Expires=1312889279&Signature=zabSm%2FFKG5D8wBE6VNVB%2BubMvDk%3D

P.P.S.: I just reread Chapter 23, Snape's Worst Memory, in OoTP. And I kind of really hate James. Don't worry, though—it won't be Snape's worst memory when _I'm_ done with it… but I'm getting ahead of myself….

**~ * ~ pagebreak ~ * ~ **

After dinner that evening, Severus walked hurriedly down to the Slytherin common room, not wanting to be late for Slughorn's party. Hastily donning the black dress robes he had saved up for and bought for the previous year's Christmas party, Severus rushed out of his dormitory.

He wanted to be outside the portrait hole before Lily, so he could be sure she wouldn't trip again—she was so clumsy, and he didn't know if her dress was long or not….

He arrived just as the hole was swinging open and, after he helped her through, Lily stood before him, cheeks slightly pink, chin jutting out as if daring him to criticize.

Severus was speechless.

Lily was resplendent in a simple black asymmetrical strapless dress, the hem longer in the back and tapering to a point. She also wore a minimalistic choker of grey pearls and her favorite Muggle shoes—elegant gladiator-style sandals. Her dark red tresses flowed unbound down her back.

Lily scowled at Severus's staring. "What's the problem?"

He looked down, suddenly embarrassed. "N-nothing. You look…"

"Laughable?" Lily suggested. "Embarrassing? Stupid?"

Severus shook his head fervently. "Elegant," he tried. "Radiant. Flawless." He pulled her close, a wicked grin on his face. "Beautiful."

She rolled her eyes. "C'mon," she said, offering him her hand. "Let's get down there, yeah?"

Several minutes of silence passed after they began walking before Severus brought up the topic they had been arguing about since leaving potions earlier that day: Lily going home for the holidays.

"Your parents probably miss you," Severus said without preamble. "They'll want to see you."

She shook her head, instantly knowing what he was talking about. "Of course they miss me, but Tuney's always horrid to me when I come home. I can't stand being there anymore. And besides…" she sidled closer to him. "I hate the thought of you here alone all break. I want to stay with you. It'll be fun!"

He smiled gratefully, gathering her into his arms. "You're such a good person, Lily," he sighed, burying his face in her hair and neck and inhaling. She smelled like Amortentia. Or, rather, Amortentia smelled like her.

"Ah-hem," came a loud and pointed interruption. Severus and Lily jumped apart to see none other than James Potter, accompanied by Sirius Black, who was for his part rather occupied by a handsome blonde girl whose face Severus could not see at the moment.

"Potter," acknowledged Lily coolly.

"Evans!" said Potter eagerly. "On your way to ol' Sluggy's party, eh?"

Lily arched one eyebrow disdainfully. "Yes, and I'm afraid we must be going… c'mon, Severus." She took her boyfriend's hand and the two made to depart. Potter, however, was having nothing of it.

"Snivelly here hasn't greeted me proper yet!" he said indignantly.

"Don't call him that!" Lily snarled, looking ready to spit sparks.

Potter just grinner, mussing up his hair. "I just want a hello from my good pal Snivellus Greasy!" He took a step towards Severus Lily made to intervene, but Severus shook his head.

"I can handle this," he assured her, stepping in front of her and drawing his wand. "If Potter does not wish to honor our truce, so be it." Potter mirrored his movement.

"Hey, now." Black had finally emerged. "No need for that, James, I can handle him." The blonde laughed, attracting a stare from Lily.

Severus narrowed his eyes, keeping his wand steady. A single word leapt, unbidden, to the forefront of his mind. A scrawl in a textbook. _For enemies. _

As if sensing his thoughts, Lily dragged Severus's wand arm out of the way. "Sev, _don't_!" she said firmly. "They're not worth it."

Black and Potter laughed. "What're you, his mum?" inquired Black. "Butt out, Evans. This is boys' time."

Before anyone so much as saw her draw her wand, Lily had whipped it out and aimed it at Black. "_Impedimenta!" _she said with force. Black was knocked backwards off his feet.

"Hey!" shouted Potter, coming forward. "What gives, Evans?" He smirked. "Surely you're not defending _that_."

Lily was not smiling. "Piss off, you waste of gravity."

Rolling his eyes and trying not to look as though he'd lost, James stalked off, beckoning his companions with him. Lily lifted the jinx with some reluctance, turning back to Severus.

He had a small frown on her face, and was watching her intently. Lily unconsciously mirrored his expression. "What's wrong?"

Severus shook his head. "Nothing." He held out his hand, stowing his wand back in his robes. "Shall we?"

The rest of their trip down to the dungeons passed without incident, but still, Severus could not still his churning thoughts. He both hated and loved when Lily defended. Hated, because it hurt his already diminutive pride, and made him feel weak. Then, on the other hand, he rather appreciated it, because it showed she cared for him—Lily Evans wasn't about to get violent over nothing.

Lost in thought, Severus hardly noticed when Lily slowed her steps, staring at him. "Severus."

"Hm?"

"You've gone past Slughorn's room."

"Wh-yeah, yes, sorry." He allowed himself to be led back several feet and into the dungeon classroom, where the revelry was already in full swing.

~ * ~ pagebreak lalala ~ * ~ *

**A/N: **Hey, did you guys realize that 'Severus Snape' is an anagram for 'pursues Evans'?

NEITHER DID I AND NOW I'M CRYING


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**A/N: I decided that Lily and I are the same height. Deal with it **

**Because I'm used to my own body, I thought it best if I gave her some characteristics I'm used to living with—height, weight, clumsiness. I'm pretty sure most writers do that. **

**And yes, I realize that 'Severus Snape' does not anagram to 'Pursues Evans.' I was tricking you. **

**Oh and this chapter was inspired by a reviewer called Lola. If you're reading, Lola, thanks for the idea!**

**~ * ~ (*&^%$#**

Just after entering, Lily ducked under a floating platter of canapés and went to get them a couple of the elegant flutes of (non-alcoholic) champagne that Slughorn had had brought down from the kitchens. Severus leaned against a wall to wait for her, feeling slightly self-conscious in his finery. With nothing better to do, he pulled out his slightly battered copy of _Advanced Potion-Making_, along with a minute travel-sized yellow goldfinch feather quill that he had borrowed from Lily.

Opening the slim volume to where he had last left off, Severus put the nib of the quill between his teeth. He was still puzzling over his last quandary—whether it was best to use two teaspoons of honey or three in the tempting potion Felix Felicis. The book said three, but odd numbers were often considered to be unlucky, and a lucky potion shouldn't have anything even remotely associated with bad luck in it… yes, perhaps it was better to use two. Severus scrawled this in the margin, placed his quill between the pages, and shut the book with a snap.

He looked up just in time to see Lily stalk past him, hot on the heels of one James Potter.

~ *&^%$&#

"Evans!"

Fingers inches from an elegant glass flute shaped like a calla lily, Lily Evans turned slightly to see—of course—James Potter, much too close for comfort.

Abandoning the glasses, she stepped sideways, away from him. "And what is it you want?" she asked disdainfully, drawing herself up to her full five feet, six inches.

"A date," he replied instantly. Lily scoffed and turned away.

"Wait." Lily looked back at him. James smiled, running a hand through his hair. "I want to talk to you. Come with me, somewhere quiet." He held out his hand. Lily eyed him doubtfully.

The hazel eyes softened as they looked into her startlingly green ones. "Trust me?" he said gently. Still refusing his hand, Lily followed him back out the door and into a nearby unused dungeon classroom.

James hopped onto the surface of a desk, swinging his legs energetically. Lily stood farther off, arms akimbo. "What is it?"

James's face grew serious. He leapt off the desk and bounded up to her, graceful as a stag. Taking both her hands in his, he smiled at her. "Go on a date with me, Evans."

Lily laughed, the sound unnaturally high. She was nervous—he could practically smell it. "Never. I'd rather date the Whomping Willow."

James shook his head, eyes widening honestly. "Nah, Evans, you'd rather date Snivellus Greasy."

Lily tore her hands from his and bared her teeth. "I told you don't _call _him that!"

James rolled his eyes. "Fine, fine—Snape, then. You'd rather date him than me and, quite frankly, it's insulting. A man's got pride, y'know?"

Lily bore down on him, suddenly frightening in her rage. "You're not a man, Potter. You're a boy. A cowardly little boy who only got into Gryffindor because his father did. The Sorting Hat often continues family traditions without looking at what's in the head. That's the only reason Severus is in Slytherin—his whole mum's side of the family were, dating back for generations. He's braver by far than you, you foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach!"

Even Lily was surprised that she hadn't drawn her wand. An even bigger surprise was Potter's expression. He didn't look amused or annoyed or even scared. He looked… hurt. Lily shook her hair disdainfully. "You know what, James? I think we sort too soon."

And she turned on her heel and strode from the room, completely failing to notice Severus standing just outside the door.

James, however, did.

"If it isn't Snivellus Greasy!" he said cheerfully, shoving Severus into the classroom and slamming the door. James Potter was a bully. And now that he'd gotten a taste of having his feelings hurt, his pride was injured and he was prone to lashing out. He was looking for a fight.

Severus eyed the other boy with something akin to disdain, but not quite—there was also pity in his gaze, and James detested it. "Potter, I heard what she said," said Severus calmly. "Lily. It's over, just forget our little rivalry. Grow up some."

James was not having it. "Keep your big nose _down, _Snivelly." He sent a disarming charm at Severus, intending to attack him once disarmed. Severus did not miss this cowardly move, and flicked the charm aside with his own wand.

The two began trading blows.

"_Impedimenta!" _

"_Protego!" _

"_Flipendo!" _This one hit, and Severus was knocked backwards, slamming his face on the stone floor with a sickening crunch. He rolled behind a desk and scrambled to his feet, instantly sending a stunning spell James's way.

"_Stupefy!" _

"_Expelli—"_

"_Sectum—"_

"_NO!" _James bawled, narrowly avoiding the curse. "You coward, don't use Dark Magic! COWARD!"

Severus made a slashing movement in the air with his wand, face contorted with rage. "DON'T!" he roared, "CALL—ME—COWARD!" James jumped to the right at the very last second as another curse _whooshed_ by him on the left, leaving him with nothing but a mere flesh wound—all four of the fingers on his left hand were slashed open, but the cuts were artificial.

Breathing heavily, the two boys faced each other. James feinted to the right, and Severus mirrored the movement. They were equally matched in terms of dueling prowess. James relaxed.

"All right," he panted. "You put yours away, I'll put mine away." Watching him carefully, Severus stowed his wand inside his robes, expecting James to leap forward and shout something like 'Don't put away your weapon in front of an enemy, Snivelly!' To his surprise, the other boy did no such thing.

James quietly stuffed his wand in his own robes and turned to go, pausing right in front of Severus. "Don't think I'll forget this, _Snivellus_," he snarled, his nose inches from the other's. Severus jerked back, baring his own teeth in kind. James left the classroom without looking back.

Suddenly, Severus felt his vision fog over. He stumbled and his knee bashed into a nearby desk, the pain stunned him, and he collapsed to the ground.

#$%^&*()

_He was kneeling in a dark room that smelt strongly of must and mould, the silk wallpaper hanging in tatters. Tears were dripping from the end of his nose onto a scrap of parchment, which bore but a few words: _

_ could ever have been friends with Gellert Grindelwald! I think his mind's going, personally! _

_ Lots of love, _

_Lily_

_Severus did not know the meaning of this paper. It appeared to be the very end of a letter. Gellert Grindelwald was an infamous Dark wizard, but Dumbledore had defeated him ages ago… who had the Dark wizard been friends with that would surprise Lily….? Nonetheless, he stowed the parchment, which contained Lily's signature and love, into an inside pocket of his robes. _

_Also in his hand was a photograph. On one side there were the long legs of a thin yet athletic man, while a dark-haired infant flew by on a toy broomstick in the background. On the second half of the photograph, Lily, her face older than he knew it to be, laughed, eyes creasing with delight. He made a motion to rip the photograph in half, but instead tucked it in its entirety into the same inner pocket, wondering where the rest of the letter could possibly be…._

_$#%^&*O(_

Severus came to on the cold dungeon floor. He sat, breathing heavily, and then clambered to his feet with some difficulty. He coughed once, spat a globule of blood onto the stone ground, wiped his mouth on his sleeve, and then, with some difficulty, wandered from the dungeon. Shockingly, their short-lived duel hadn't attracted the attention of Slughorn, Filch, or any of the party-goers, and Severus was able to sleep back among the revelry without incident. Lily stood right by the door, two glasses of near-flat virgin champagne in her hands, looking rather upset.

Lily took in his bleeding mouth and swollen nose and her own mouth opened slightly. Severus stared at her for a heartbeat before Severus wrenched her into his arms, burying his face in her long, sweet-smelling hair. Lily dropped both of the flutes, but the tinkle of shattering glass went unnoticed in the boisterous atmosphere.

"S-Sev?" she whispered, hands frantically patting his back, instinctually looking for further injury. "Sev, what—?"

"I've missed you," he murmured into her neck.

Lily pulled back from him, though he did not loosen his hold on her wais. "Sev, you've only been gone like twenty minutes… speaking of which, where did you—?"

Severus interrupted her by kissing her on the mouth, a bit sloppily due to his torn lip. But it was safe and warm and wet, and Lily then experienced the curious sensation of blushing all over. She was not familiar with the expression on his face. If she had to put a name on it, she supposed it was a mixture of loving, fearful, and pain-drunk.

"Sev, what happened to your _face_?" she asked, concerned, dabbing at his lower lip with the edge of her shawl. He waved her hand away.

"Don't stain it," he reasoned. "Do you know a spell that can fix this? I was never that keen on healing spells." He made a mental note to remedy that, perhaps even come up with one that could heal the effects of his pet curse, _Sectumsempra_.

Lily smiled. "It's not a stain, silly, it's you." But she pulled out her wand anyway, taking careful aim at Severus's face. "_Episkey_," she said with feeling, and, with a small _pop_, Severus's lip neatly knitted itself together. She frowned critically at her handiwork.

"Still a bit of blood," she said, and, licking the edge of her shawl, she dabbed gently at his mouth.

Laughing, Severus intoned, "you know, there's a spell for that, too." Lily just shrugged. As she wiped a spot of blood from his nose with her shawl, he winced and hissed his breath in sharply through his teeth.

"Does that hurt?" she asked softly, gently probing the bridge of his nose with her fingers. "Oh, god, Sev, your _nose_…."

"Can you fix it?" he asked worriedly, hands flying to his face. Lily laughed.

"Honestly, Sev, you're the vainest person I know. _Episkey." _With another small pop, his broken nose snapped back into place. Severus winced, rubbing it.

"Lily?" he asked, as she began to siphon the sticky drinks off the carpet with her wand.

"Mmh?"

"Is… is my nose big?"

Lily looked up at him, brows arching in disbelief, before bursting into laughter. Severus loved her laugh—it came in clear peals are pure as a bell. "Honestly, Sev," she repeated. "You _are_ the vainest person I know."

He wasn't smiling. "Answer me!"

Lily eyed him critically. His nose was aquiline—hooked, like an eagle's beak. But no, certainly not overlarge for his face. It just wasn't straight, which wasn't a flaw in and of itself. Merely an attribute. It gave his face character.

"_Well_?"

She rolled her eyes, grabbing his hand and starting to walk. "Yes, it's big. You look like a vulture, it's positively ghastly. C'mon, let's go get something to drink before they run out."

Severus looked horrified, clamping his other hand over his nose. "Are you being sarcastic? Lily? Lily!" But she would only laugh.

After an evening spent dancing and stealing sips of alcohol meant for the adults and the students who were of age, Lily and Severus were both properly exhausted. After a passionate (and thoroughly physical) goodbye at the Gryffindor common room's portrait hole, the couple parted ways, she for her tower, and he for his dungeon.

*&^*%&$^#% &*%^5 468 56 8 8 85 644

That night, Severus lay in bed, listening to the sounds of his empty dormitory. The scuttle of a mouse across the beams in the ceiling overhead; the anguished howling of the snowstorm outside; and... the rustle of footsteps in the corridor outside his dormitory.

He listened with bated breath as the latch above the doorknob was pulled free of its hook, and he heard the door inch forward with a rasp of protest, then listened as it paused in its tracks.

A dark form slipped into the dormitory, visible only by the dim light of the dying fires in the common room. The figure shut the door, and all went dark.

After a series of light footfalls almost too quiet to hear, Severus felt a curtain of hair brush across the exposed skin of his neck and chest like a warm spring rain, along with lips like flower petals. He sighed.

_Lily. _

98(*&^%$#$&^%**$&$&%

**A/N: ZOMGAR SEX. See, not too vulgar. PLEASE IF I MAKE ANY ERRORS LET ME KNOW. Saves me embarrassment, makes you look clever. We all win. 3**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**A/N: **Wow, mixed views of my ~slight hinting at sex. I did get some reviews saying that some of you aren't going to read this fic anymore!

I must say I'm disappointed. I purposely wrote it to be ambiguous, so that if you don't want to read about sex, you can imagine that they're just spending the night together/cuddling/making out/whatever. I never used vulgar language or outright stated that intercourse took place. Some of you have weak stomachs.

Oh, well. If you're sticking with me, I appreciate it. If not, I'm sorry to have offended you. It's my story and I will take it where I choose.

P.S.:

!~!$%#%^&%&*^^%

The early morning sunshine streamed through the high vaulted windows in the Slytherin dormitories. Severus Snape reclined in a pool of it, still half-asleep, a small smile on his face as he savored the warmth.

Strange, he mused, how even in the middle of December, even after the fury of the previous night's storm, sunshine could still warm him in the usually frigid dungeons.

He realized that he was sprawled in a strange position, almost a C-shape, curled around… he opened his eyes. Nothing. He was curled around the empty half of the bed. Upon probing the sheets with his fingers, he discovered that they were cold. Just like that, the warmth and the contentment vanished from his body, and he knew that it was not the watery December sunlight that had kept him warm; it was the memories and half-dreams of the previous night.

Lily.

But where was she now? Now that everyone (including Potter and Black, thank Merlin) had gone home for the holidays, he was, to be sure, quite alone in his dormitory. So Lily would have had no cause to leave. Then why had she?

&(^%*$&*(%^*$

Lily awoke with a start and bolted upright, chest heaving. After a moment, she realized that the danger was only in her head, and her breathing began to slow. She leaned on one arm and looked down at Severus, smiling fondly at him. Her Sev.

He was lying on his stomach with his arms hugging the pillow, face turned towards her and obscured by his long dark hair. Running a finger along the contours of his spine, Lily reflected that she truly was blessed.

After her panic finally passed, she flopped back onto her pillow, on her back, face turned towards Sev, one arm draped over the curve of his lower back. The other arm she tossed carelessly over her eyes to make the dim room even darker. It couldn't be past seven in the morning, yet she was wide awake as could be. Perhaps a quick walk.

##$#%^&*(*

Having roused himself and dressed, Severus trotted down several corridors to a small unused Potions store cupboard. He had been coming here for the past several weeks, working on a little project. The cupboard, though mainly devoid of ingredients, was equipped with a small desk and stool and a sink, as well as the materials Severus had brought—several tiny glass vials, a small, sharp knife, his copy of _Advanced Potion Making_, as well as an abundance of ingredients nicked from the store cupboards that were in use.

Rifling in his textbook to the dog-eared page, Severus settled down to work, admiring the soft, simmering brand of magic that is Potion-making.

_Felix Felicis, _the title of the page read. Liquid Luck. Christmas was fast approaching, and as Severus was poor and unskilled in the fine arts, he decided that his best bet at a present for Lily was something he was good at.

However, Felix Felicis was an insanely tricky potion to make, and not only useless but also potentially catastrophic to get wrong. Severus had already messed it up twice, and did not intend to make that mistake again.

He thought he might have it this time.

"Okay," Severus muttered to himself, going down the list of ingredients and directions. "Book says three teaspoons of honey… I say two. Now, scaling the recipe down to size, that's… one third of a teaspoon? No, no, no…"

One of Severus's main problems was that he didn't have nearly enough of any of the ingredients to make a full batch, so he was reducing the recipe several times. Math wasn't exactly his strong suit, either.

$#%^&* &%%4b ^%& $*^T^%^E5

Lily wandered the dark corridors, wearing one of Sev's white button downs over her pajamas. The dungeons were chilly at night, she noted dryly. And dark. Wait, was that a light? And… what was that sound? Creepy.

She soon became lost in the labyrinthine dungeons, and as soon as she realized this, she had to force herself not to panic. Nothing in Hogwarts wanted to hurt her, she assured herself.

She wandered for what felt like hours. Was there no end to these wretched halls? Then suddenly she heard a sound. Like someone talking, almost…. Sev?

Sure enough, when she crept over to the nearest door, it was ajar, and candlelight issued from it. She could hear Severus's voice. He appeared to be talking to himself. She stifled a laugh, and continued walking on.

She quickly found her way out of the dungeons and stole up the marble staircase in the entrance hall, meaning to return to her dormitory to fetch something.

Once there, she quickly opened her trunk, leaned into it, and dug out two mugs and two teabags—peppermint chamomile, both her and Sev's favorite.

^$^%*&(^%&^$

Severus sat poring over his textbook, nose nearly touching the paper, practically begging the book to reveal the trick to this difficult potion. There came a tiny knock at the door, and he immediately shut the book with a snap and swept any stray ingredients into his bag, and then turned to face the intruder.

Lily stood at the door, dressed only in a tank top, pajama shorts, and a white collared shirt that Severus recognized as his own. Her eyes were heavy-lidded with sleep; her legs were lanky and bare. There were teeth marks on her neck. In her hands, she clutched two coffee mugs.

She walked forward, slowly, as if sleepwalking, and set the mugs on the table, pulling two teabags out of the pocket of his shirt. "Tea?" she inquired innocently.

He smiled at her, taking the mugs and filling them from the faucet, and then tapped each with his wand to heat the water. Setting them on the desk, he sat down, and then looked guiltily at Lily. "There's only one seat," he began. "You take—"

She interrupted him by plopping herself in his lap, wrapping her arms around her neck, and burrowing her face in his chest. "_Tell me how all this, and love too_, _will ruin us_," said Lily softly. After Severus said nothing, she laughed, pulled away, and said, "Richard Siken. Muggle poet, an American."

Severus finally encircled her waist with his own arms. "Appropriate. The quote, I mean." Quietly, the two sipped at their tea. Severus grimaced; while Lily preferred her tea without anything in it, he generally took his with copious amounts of sugar.

After she was finished, Lily set her cup on the desk and slumped sideways, leaning on Severus's shoulder. "Tired."

"Mmh."

"So… tired."

Severus smiled, set his own cup down, and stood, hefting Lily into his arms. She sighed contentedly, nuzzling into his neck.

He carried her back to his own dormitory and set her on her feet near his bed. "I should get back to my dormitory.

Severus grinned at her. "Am I getting my shirt back?"

Lily rubbed her eye with the sleeve. "No." She yawned hugely, showing white, even teeth—the work of years of Muggle braces. Severus looked fondly at the girl he loved, the girl who finally loved him. And then he watched her leave.

(^*&^%^%&^%* ^*%(^$ &R %^&%$& & & $^% yeah I'm getting pretty good at page breaks &%

**A/N: **Quote from Rowling: "Given his time over again [Snape] would not have become a Death Eater, but like many insecure, vulnerable people he craved membership of something big and powerful, something impressive.[...] [He] was so blinded by his attraction to the dark side he thought [Lily] would find him impressive if he became a real Death Eater."

So I can pretty much end it however I like, knowing that Severus possesses no real desire to be bad.

Also, after this chapter, I sense a loss of readers. *rolls eyes*


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**A/N: Sorry this took so long! But it's a long one, so I'm sure you understand. **

**P.S.: I've figured out a good way to end it, when the time comes. I don't want to give anything away, but if you PM me, I'll give you hints! :3**

#$%^&*(*

For the next several days, Severus continued to work diligently on his task of brewing Liquid Luck, so much so that Lily complained of not seeing him enough. Feeling guilty (she _did_ stay at Hogwarts just for him), Severus took a break from his work on Christmas Eve and resolved to spend an entire day with Lily.

The result of this decision was that he had to wake up early to finish. But Severus was almost completely sure that he had gotten the potion correct this time, having tested it the night of Slughorn's party—but the potion itself wasn't the only part of the gift.

Selecting the glass vial he wanted, Severus poured the remaining amount of potion into it, then set it upright in a wooden test tube rack. He carefully sealed the bottle with magic and affixed a tiny label to it with a Permanent Sticking Charm.

Now came the hard part.

Fishing around in his pocket, Severus caught hold of and pulled out the several Galleons that he had been saving expressly for this purpose. Stacking them neatly and tapping his wand, he began the long incantation that he had worked out carefully from a hodgepodge of other spells. Slowly, the Galleons melted, moved around, and reformed into a fine golden chain with delicately interlocking loops. Strung on the chain was a larger loop with a long, straight bit, which Severus drove into the cork of the vial.

The result was essentially a Felix Felicis necklace.

Feeling rather proud of himself, Severus concealed the gift in a small, battered box that had once contained an unknown potion ingredient before leaving the room to meet Lily outside the Gryffindor common room.

%^$&*(^^*%$^3

While neither of them was particularly good at Wizarding chess, they both enjoyed the game. Severus, however, found himself hopelessly outclassed—Lily slaughtered him in every single game.

Then Lily insisted they get some studying in—and Severus was beginning to get a bit nervous about his Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L., so he agreed with little resistance. Lily, for her part, was nearly in tears over Arithmancy, which Severus couldn't much help with, seeing as how he wasn't in that class. However, they were both having trouble with the memorization required in Professor Binns's class, and studying managed to eat up several hours.

While practicing Transfiguration, Lily managed to turn Severus's eyes a bizarre, dark gold color, and nearly couldn't turn them back. He paid her back by turning her hair blue, much to her chagrin. After a bit of pleading on her part, however, he quickly set it right.

Sometime after dinner, the sky began to darken and both admitted that it was time to be getting to bed. After a quick kiss outside the portrait hole, Lily gave Severus an oddly searching look before bidding him goodnight, leaving him slightly unsettled.

^&%$^#Q%

That night for the first time in a long while, Severus did not nightmare. He dreamed.

_He was lying in bed, the same as in real life, but instead of the darkness of the Slytherin dormitory, golden sunlight filtered through his lashes. He was warm all over, wearing a cotton nightshirt and loosely covered by a soft quilt. He felt the warm weight of a sleeping animal somewhere near his knees._

_Somehow, he knew that he was not alone. _

_He opened his eyes a slit to see a silhouette, crouching on the floor, arms on the bed. He blinked once, and then opened his eyes fully to see a child, a girl, looking at him with an expression of deep-set calm in her dark eyes. His eyes. _

_He reached out tentatively and stroked her hair. To his intense surprise and (?) joy, she did not recoil, but smiled at him, small pink lips pursed. "Are you awake?" _

"_Yes," he said in wonder, fingering a strand of hair. It was a shocking shade of dark red, much like…. _

"_Mummy said pancakes are ready," she said, rubbing her freckled nose. Severus stared at her, propped up on one elbow. _

"_Oh, okay," he murmured tiredly. "Tell her I'll be up in a few." The child scurried out of the room, bare feet padding lightly on the wooden floor. Severus rubbed his eyes with a fist, childlike, trying to get a handle on his thoughts. As he did so, he noticed that on the ring finger of his left hand, there was a ring. A wedding ring?_

Let this one last, _he thought desperately. _Please, let me have this.

_But no sooner had he thought it than the room began to dissolve, though the warm, contented feeling remained. Severus's eyes darted around the room, trying frantically to memorize it. _

_%^$&*(^*%$#%^&*(*%$#$%^&*(*_

He awoke in a fashion much like that of the nightmares—suddenly, with a pounding heart and the feeling that he could not get enough air into his lungs. He put his head in his hands, trying to remember the room. To his surprise, he had no trouble doing so.

The walls had been covered yellow silk, a colour he ordinarily didn't like, but it made the room feel cradled somehow, like being inside an egg. The warmth near his legs had been a black cat, curled up asleep. The floors were blond hardwood, the bed a queen—a two-person bed. Mummy, the child had said. His child. Who was the mother?

The answer presented itself to him almost immediately. Lily. The child's hair was exactly her colour, the freckles her freckles. The dream itself was unsurprising—of course he wanted to marry Lily. He had known that since the day they had met. But the fact that he was having these dreams at all unsettled him.

He had never experienced sensation in dreams before—touch. Sunlight in dreams had never made him feel warm when he woke up.

Realizing that it was Christmas morning, Severus shoved the dream to the back of his mind as usual, tossed back the covers, approached his wardrobe, and began to dress. A simple word and the stubble on his cheeks crumbled into dust. Magic was so useful, sometimes.

After clothing himself, Severus immediately headed to the store cupboard where he had secreted the necklace. Lily's gift. Upon retrieving the battered ingredient box and ensuring that no harm had come to the pendant, he stowed it safely in an inside pocket of his robes for later.

Thighs burning from the vast amount of stairs between his common room and Lily's, Severus thought that it was no wonder Muggle children were so unfit these days—there was no way their schools could have this many staircases.

Once at the portrait hole, Severus leaned against the wall and knocked over his shoulder on the painting; the Fat Lady was away visiting a friend, it seemed. After a moment, the unoccupied painting swing open, and Severus turned to face none other than Mary MacDonald, who greeted him with a surprised smile, leaning through the hole.

"Oh… hi, Severus," she said warmly. Ever since he had defended her by the lake, she had become much friendlier towards him. "You may as well come in—it's pretty much just me and Lily."

Severus obeyed, stepping carefully over the edge and into the Gryffindor common room, looking around curiously—he had never been in this room before. It was, predictably, decked out in scarlet and gold, filled with overstuffed armchairs and unlit torches. Lily was on her knees on the carpet, in a long cotton nightdress, tearing eagerly at a brightly wrapped parcel.

She looked up, surprise brightening her features. "Sev!" she called. "Happy Christmas! Mary, come look what Mum's sent me!"

Severus and Mary approached Lily. Mary settled herself in a nearby armchair; Severus plopped on the floor next to Lily, smiling as she held up her mother's present, a deep blue turtleneck sweater. "Ooh, she always knows what colours look best on me!" exclaimed Lily, holding the sweater against her chest and then folding it neatly and setting it down. "Hi, Sev!" she smiled widely, and then flung her arms around his neck for a Christmas kiss.

"Get a room!" called Mary, absorbed in a book she'd received—a Muggle crime novel, from the cover. Lily laughed and stuck her tongue out, then turned eagerly to Severus.

"I couldn't think of what to get you, Sev—"

"You didn't have to get me anything—"

"—but then I remembered! Come with me, it's still up in my room."

Bemused, blushing, and embarrassed, Severus followed Lily up a staircase and into what appeared to be a girls' dormitory. Taking his hand, Lily led him over to her bed, and the pair sat, Severus awkwardly trying to ignore what seemed to him to be an excessive amount of female undergarments strewn about.

Without looking at him, Lily whispered, "Close your eyes." He did so with no hesitation. "Now hold out your hands." Again, he obeyed.

After a small rustling sound, Severus felt a soft, downy object being pressed into his hands. Then, to his utter surprised, the thing _moved_. His eyes snapped open to see a tiny grey kitten with eyes the color of new spring leaves—green, but lighter than Lily's. The cat appeared just as surprised to see Severus, and it mewled softly, squirming in an attempt to gain footing in his opened hands.

Lily was watching him nervously. "I didn't have time to wrap her," she said softly, stroking the kitten's skull. "But you've never had a pet, I don't think, and we could all use—use some company." Her voice faltered.

Watching the tiny thing wriggling defencelessly in his palms, Severus's face broke into an astonished smile. He had never been responsible for another living thing before. "I—Lily, thank you."

There was, at last, a tiny smile on her face. "Her name's Olive," she informed him, rubbing the cat's shoulders. "I got her at a pet store last Hogsmeade weekend. She's at least part kneazle, so she should live a bit longer than your ordinary housecat." Severus hesitantly rubbed the kitten behind her ears, and got a contented purr in response. "You like her?"

"I love her," replied Severus in wonder. He had had a cat in his dream. Certainly not this cat—part kneazle or not, it wouldn't live quite that long, and it was the wrong colour, anyway. But he did like cats, and he owned one, both in this world and in that one—perhaps the two were not that far apart.

"Would you like to see what I'm giving Professor Slughorn?"

Boosting Olive up to stand on his shoulder, Severus walked carefully around the bed after Lily to see a glass bowl of water on her bedside table, a bright-eyed goldfish swimming happily in circles within it. "A fish?"

"No, watch." Pulling out her wand, Lily transfigured the fish into a lily petal. It floated to the top of the water, then slowly sank. At Lily's word, the petal wriggled, then returned to its original form. "I'm going to Charm it to turn back into a fish as Slughorn walks into the room," she explained. "I think I'll leave it in his office while he's at dinner or something."

"That's brilliant," breathed Severus. "That's extraordinary magic. You're getting the hand of Transfiguration, no doubt." He tapped the bowl lightly with a fingernail. "Would you like your gift now or later?

Lily's eyes widened pleasurably. "Now."

"Close your eyes and hold out your hands." She did so, and Severus stuck two fingers in his pocket and removed the tattered box, placing it in her palms. She opened her eyes and peered at the box's lid, confused.

"Sev, what even does this say?"

"Just open it!"

With her thumb and index finger, Lily removed the lid of the box. Her mouth opened as she lifted the vial to her eyes, reading the label. "Felix… Liquid Luck! Sev, where did you get this?"

"I didn't. I made it."

Lily's eyes were sparkling—she was impressed. "Put it on me."

Severus came to stand behind her, gently letting the kitten—his kitten—down onto the floor. Lily lifted her hair out of the way obediently, and with his stout fingernails, Severus secured the clasp. Lily stared in the mirror, mouth open slightly.

"Sev, it's _lovely_."

He smiled, arms encircling her waist from behind, and buried his face in her hair. She giggled and skittered away from him like a nervous deer. "That tickles!"

She touched her pendant and smiled gratefully at him. "Go show Mary your new friend, I've got to get dressed." Severus departed down the staircase, careful to support Olive's legs. Once in the common room, he let the kitten free, being sure to keep an eye on her wanderings.

Mary glanced up from her novel to see Olive, worrying the edge of a plush rug with her small, sharp teeth. The girl's face lit up. "Aw, the kitty!" she cooed, abandoning her novel to crawl across the floor. "I was with Lily when she bought her." Captured, the kitten mewled in surprise, peering at Mary's face, taking a swipe at her long hair.

Severus smiled, reclining in a chair. "I've always liked cats."

Mary looked at him, surprise. "Really? How come you never had one?"

Severus considered this, stifling a yawn. "My father doesn't really care for animals."

Mary nodded, holding Olive close to hear her purr. "I can't imagine," she said softly, "growing up without pets. We always had so many animals, it was like living on a farm." She sighed. "I miss them."

They descended into silence until the door to the girls' dormitory opened and Lily descended the staircase, positively glowing, smiling at her friends.

%^&*(&^%$3

After fixing Olive with a bowl of scraps from the kitten and depositing her safely in Severus's dormitory, he and Lily headed down to the Great Hall. Christmas dinner that evening was a quiet one, and with just a few students and teachers, they only bothered with one table. But the food was no less splendid—roast potatoes, sprouts, and a magnificent turkey the size of a small child.

Severus of course was by now used to the strangeness that came with staying in the castle for Christmas, but it was Lily's first time away from home for the holidays. She blushed whenever a professor spoke casually to her, and nearly upset the tureen of gravy when Professor Slughorn asked her to pass it.

All throughout the dinner, Dumbledore gave Severus long, searching looks, and Severus wondered if the headmaster somehow knew of his own part in Severus's strange dreams. His bright blue eyes had the unsettling glint of Legimency in them, and Severus took care to keep his own eyes averted and his thoughts neutral.

Lily was the first to leave, wanting to leave Professor Slughorn's gift in his office. Slowly, the odd group broke apart, and Severus departed sleepily for his dormitory, wanting nothing more than a long sleep with Olive curled up near his head.

%^&%*(^%$#$$$$$$$$4

_A/N: Sev's dream in this chapter was inspired by a lovely bit of fanart, found here: _lily-fox [dot] deviantart [dot] com/art/In-another-life-wake-up-243813421

If the link doesn't work, it's by the extremely talented Lily-Fox on Deviant art. Hopefully she does not get mad that I ripped off her idea. If she does, I'll willingly take that part out and rewrite it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**A/N: Every time I get an e-mail with the subject [FF Review Alert], I start freaking out that it's going to be negative. So far, I have 41 good reviews and 1 negative. Thank you guys so much for not throwing bricks at me c: And a super thank you to all of you who point out mistakes I make! You make my story better. Every one of my readers is invaluable. **

**%^$&$^*(&(^**

The next several months passed in uniform contentedness. Severus's odd dreams stopped, the good and the bad. Kisses were exchanged, potions brewed, Olive chased anything that moved, Horace Slughorn named his goldfish Francis. The weather warmed and the days lengthened until, finally, the dreaded exams were upon them: O.W.L.s.

With McGonagall's favor, Lily had quickly become adept at Transfiguration, and, with Lily's help, Severus improved in his Charms work. The only test Severus was truly worried about was the Defense Against the Dark Arts exams, both written and practical. While he excelled in the subject, he was unsure of how difficult the exams would be.

The morning of the written test dawned bright and sunny, the air already possessing some of the warmth of the coming summer. Severus and Lily sat in the shade of a large beech tree, studying in the time remaining before the test.

Severus, for his part, was unable to concentrate; Lily was wearing her summer uniform already, and the skirt was proving to be distracting. She smelled of vanilla and sunshine and the raspberry tea she was drinking, and days spent in the sun had freckled her skin even more.

Lily made a face at Severus and shoved the book in his face. "We're about out of time, Sev."

Reluctantly, Severus stowed his books in his bags and followed her back into the castle, turning left into the Great Hall, where Professor Flitwick would be administering the test.

"Wish me luck," said Lily, and he knew she was keeping her voice low so he couldn't hear it shake.

"Good luck," he replied bracingly, and they both took seats in the side of the Hall designated for their House. Groaning inwardly, Severus watched all four of the so-called "Marauders" take seats near Lily. Much to her credit, she flipped her hair over her shoulder, buried her nose in her notes, and made studious work of ignoring them.

Shaking out his thoughts like a rug, Severus turned to his own O.W.L. paper, reviewing the defensive spells for what felt like the hundredth time. He didn't have long to study, however—after just a few minutes, Professor Flitwick got their attention from the front of the room, and the exam began.

%$^$&*^%$^&%$#

Ages into the exam, Severus ran a hand through his hair, wishing for the tenth time that he had remembered to bring a hair-tie. He was, he thought, quite done with the paper, and breathed a sigh of relief when Professor Flitwick called "Five more minutes!"

Just as Severus was beginning to get restless, Professor Flitwick shouted, "Quills down, please! That means you too, Stebbins!" He brandished his wand. "Please remain seated while I collect your parchment! _Accio_!"

More than a hundred rolls of parchment went flying towards the diminutive Professor, knocking him backwards off his feet, inciting a bit of laughter. The couple frontmost students left their desks to help him to his feat again.

"Thank you… thank you," huffed Professor Flitwick. "Very well, everybody, you're free to go!"

Nearly everyone stood at once, causing a flurry of movement and sound. Severus, still absorbed in the question paper, made for the lawns of the school, hoping to find Lily so they could review the papers. Question ten (give five signs that identify the werewolf) had been an easy one, considering his now-distant run in with that werewolf, Lupin, and his stupid friends….

Severus settled himself in the shade of a dense clump of bushes, looking around him for Lily. With dread, he realized that he had seated himself right near the Marauders. Stowing his paper in his bag, he got up and started walking back towards the castle, but it was no use—Black had spotted him.

"All right, Snivellus?" Potter called loudly.

Instinctively, Severus reacted, dropping his bag and drawing his wand. But before he could get it fully into the air, Potter shouted, "_Expelliarmus!" _Severus's wand went flying and landed in the grass not far behind him.

Black laughed as Severus turned to get it and raised his own wand. "_Impedimenta!" _Severus was knocked off his feet, unable to move much.

Much to his embarrassment, a crowd was beginning to gather. Potter and Sirius, too cowardly to face anyone alone after Potter's defeat last Christmas, began advancing on the fallen Severus as he panted, struggling to get up.

"How'd the exam go, Snivelly?" asked Potter.

"I was watching him, his nose was touching the parchment," said Black with venom. "There'll be great grease marks all over it, they don't be able to read a word."

Several of the gathered students laughed. Severus continued his attempts to get to his feet, thrashing as though bound by invisible ropes. "You—wait," he panted, staring up at the pair of them and Potter in particular with an expression of purest loathing. "You—wait…."

"Wait for what?" asked Black disdainfully, tossing his hair. "What're you going to do, Snivelly, wipe your nose on us?"

Severus muttered a desperate stream of mixed swear words and hexes, but as his wand was still several feet away, nothing happened.

Potter eyed the boy on the ground with utter disgust, as though Severus were something he'd found on the bottom of his shoe. "Wash out your mouth. _Scourgify!" _

At once, the bitter taste of soap filled Severus's mouth, and he felt bubbles stream from his lips. He couldn't breathe, the froth was choking him—

"Leave him ALONE!" someone nearby shouted, and Severus looked up with relief to see Lily, wand drawn.

Potter's tone immediately switched to something a bit more pleasant, but with an undertone as slick and greasy as oiled glass. "All right, Evans?"

"Leave him alone," Lily repeated, looking at him with hatred. "What's he done to you?"

"Well," said Potter, mock-thoughtfully, "it's more the fact that he _exists_, if you know what I mean…." Several people laughed at this, and he mussed up his hair like a peacock preening itself.

Lily wasn't laughing. "You think you're funny," she said coldly. "But you're just a bullying, arrogant toerag, Potter. Leave him _alone_."

"I will if you go out with me, Evans," said Potter eagerly. "Go on…. Go out with me, and I'll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again."

Finally, the Impediment Jinx began to wear off. Severus inched towards his wand, gagging soapsuds as he crawled.

"I wouldn't go out with you if it was a choice between you and the giant squid," Lily growled.

"Bad luck, Prongs," said Black briskly, turning back to Severus. "OI!"

But his warning was too late—Severus had his wand trained on Potter. _Sectumsempra! _he said silently. There was a flash of light, and a long gash appeared on his cheek, matching the one he had received from Severus all those months ago.

Potter reciprocated with a spell of Severus's—_Levicorpus_—and Severus felt himself jerked into the air by his ankle, robes falling over his head. Due to the warm day, he hadn't bothered wearing trousers under his robes, a fact that made everyone watching cheer and laugh.

Lily was so furious she felt her eye twitch. "Let him down!"

"Certainly," replied Potter, and he performed the counterspell—_Liberacorpus_—and Severus fell to the ground in a heap. Immediately, he extricated himself and leapt to his feet, raising his wand, but Black said, "_Locomotor mortis!" _and Severus's knees buckled as his legs went rigid.

"LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Lily shouted, her wand trained at Potter's face.

"Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you."

"Take the curse off him, then!"

Potter gave an exasperated sigh, and then muttered the countercurse obligingly. "There you go," he said as Severus struggled to his feet once more. "You're lucky the Mudblood was here, Snivellus—"

"Don't _call_ her that!" Severus roared, raising his wand, but Lily wrenched his arm out of the way.

"Don't even bother with them, Sev, they aren't worth the trouble." Reluctantly, Severus turned and followed her away.

Before they'd made it more than a couple feet, James called after them, "I'd wash my pants if I were you, Snivellus!"

Lily whirled around, shoulder-length hair flying. "Messing up your hair because you think it looks cool to look like you've just got off your broomstick, showing off with that stupid Snitch, walking down corridors hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can—I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK. C'mon, Sev." She grabbed his wrist and strode away, leading him with her.

"Evans!" Potter shouted after her. "Hey, EVANS!"

But she didn't look back.

%^*&$%#%^^&

**A/N: This is the end of "Part 1" of this story. "Part 2" is on its way. **


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**A/N: For several reasons but mostly because of the overwhelming flood of supportive messages and reviews I've received, I have managed to jot down a quick chapter for you. **

**Someone left me an extremely negative review. If any of you think that I'm being "attention-seeking" or overdramatic or something, I apologize. If you're the kind of person who could ever think that you know a person's life story from reading two paragraphs about recent events, then I pity you. **

**This is the beginning of part 2. As Lily and Sev were in the fifth year in 1976, they'll have graduated in 1978. Trelawney made the prophecy in summer of 1979. So that's when this begins. **

**()*&^%$^%$$%**

"Some plans were made, and rice was thrown; a house was built, a baby born. How time can move both fast and slow amazes me." – Bright Eyes, "I Believe in Symmetry"  
>~<p>

"Rose."

Severus Snape looked up from his morning edition of the _Daily Prophet_ and over to his wife, who was standing near the stove in the tiny flat that they were renting. "Hm?" he inquired politely, indicating that he had not caught what she had said.

"We could name the baby Rose," repeated Lily, taking the hand that was not holding her wand over a steaming kettle and placing it on her ever-growing belly.

It took Severus a great effort not to roll his eyes. Noticing her husband's contempt, Lily looked indignant. "What? It's a pretty name! And it continues the flower tradition; Lily, Petunia, Rose. Little Rosie."

"It's boring," said Severus dismissively, returning to his _Prophet_. The kettle began to whistle, demanding Lily's attention, and she went through the familiar motion of pouring boiling water into intricately lacquered mugs.

"What do you suggest, then?" she asked Severus, setting his mug in front of him and taking her seat beside him.

Severus reached over the empty plates and picked up a slim book lying nearby—_Latin Baby Names_. Lily groaned. "I've already written down a list of the ones I like from here," he replied, consulting a sheaf of parchment carelessly tucked into the book. "Alida," he began.

"What does that _mean_?"

"Little winged one."

Lily considered this. "Maybe. Keep going."

"Juniper."

"I like Juniper," interrupted Lily, sipping at her tea. "That's a flower."

"Kalare. Means 'bright or 'clear.'" Lily made a noise of noncommittal, so he went on. "Your name's in here."

Lily looked nonplussed. "My name is Latin? What's it mean?"

"Purity."

She rolled her eyes. "Continue."

"Luna, the moon. Maren and Maris, both mean the sea. Mei—great one." One of the cats padded softly into the room, and Lily softly touched his flank as he passed her. One side of Severus's mouth lifted in a smile, and he looked back to his list. "Those are all the names I liked enough to write down."

Lily chewed her lip in thought. "Let me see that." She slipped the sheaf of parchment from his hands, eyes scanning it thoughtfully. "My favorites are Alida, Maren, Juniper and Mei."

"I'm ruling out Mei," decided Severus, crossing out the discarded names with a spare quill.  
>"Alida Snape," said Lily, thinking aloud. "Maren Snape." She made a face, and crossed that one out. "Juniper Snape?" She looked at her husband. When he made no reply, she continued speaking. "Juniper, clean your room," she tried. "June, dinner's ready!"<p>

"June," Severus mused. "Juniper. Juniper Snape." Lily smiled. "Maybe," Severus said, finishing his tea.

%$^&*( &^%$ _one year later _%^*&^

These were dark times, there was no denying it.

_Family of Muggles found dead in Cokeworth,_ the headline blared. _Feared Death Eater involvement. _

Severus Snape sighed and shook out his paper, laying it flat on the breakfast table. Lily was from Cokeworth. The only reason he wasn't panicking about her possible death was that she was sitting beside him, rubbing his shoulder with one hand and clutching their young daughter in the other.

"He really is out there," she murmured, looking at the paper. "You-know-who."

Severus nodded. "Lily, maybe we should just… go into hiding. Wait for this to pass."

"Go into hiding? Sev, he's out there killing people! Those could've been childhood neighbors," she said indignantly, indicating the paper. Her volume caused baby Juniper to squeal. "Those could've been my parents and sister," she added, softer, her voice shaking. "We have to fight," she continued, her voice strong once more.

Severus shook his head, folding the paper closed. "Fight how? What chance do we have against someone like—someone like him? He's killing Muggle-borns for fun, Lily," he said, his eyes pleading.

"Dumbledore." She said the surname with hope, respect, and most of all with fervent admiration. "He started this organization, years ago, the Order of the Phoenix. It's for people… people who… want to resist." Juniper grabbed at her mother's fingers, and Lily kissed her daughter's red hair.

Severus stared at her. She had ever been a fiery one in their school days, quick to defend herself and her friends. Why should she change that just because she could now be in mortal danger for doing so?

Lily Snape would sooner die than abandon her friends and family. Severus had known that when he married her fresh out of school several years ago.

Lily turned to her husband. Her face was set, her arms tight around the infant in her arms. "We can fight him, Sev," she said softly. "We have to fight him."

$%^&*&^%4 _several weeks later_

Dumbledore sat behind his desk, his wise face grave, and no sign of the characteristic twinkle in his eye. He surveyed the three people seated before him with his keen vision, seriously considering the situation.

Lily took Severus's hand in her own. Juniper was safely ensconced in her lap, arms twined around her mother's neck.

Dumbledore sighed, rubbing his temples with his long fingers. "I'm sure you are wondering, Lily, Severus, why I have summoned you here today."

Lily nodded, her eyes pleading. Severus felt numb.

"I have received some information which concerns you…." Without preamble, he continued. "Almost exactly a year ago, a prophecy was given to me by one of the teachers here at Hogwarts—Professor Trelawney. The prophecy concerned an infant." Unconsciously, Lily's hold on her daughter tightened. Dumbledore did not miss this gesture. "An infant boy," he continued, "born to parents who have thrice defied Lord Voldemort, born as the seventh month dies."

Recognition was slowly dawning on Lily's face. "Alice," she said softly. "Her son. Neville."

Dumbledore inclined his head gravely. "I have already spoken to Alice and her husband, Frank. They are going into hiding by way of the Fidelius Charm. Lily," said Dumbledore, focusing his intense gaze upon the girl with the firmly set mouth. "Alice has decided upon you and your husband to be the Longbottom family's Secret-Keepers. Do you accept?"

Placing a hand to her trembling lips, Lily nodded. Severus remained frozen.

"H-how does—he—know about the prophecy, if it was given to you, Sir?" Lily asked.

"A young Death Eater by the name of Regulus Black happened to be listening outside the door of my room at the Hog's Head," explained Dumbledore. "Fortunately, he didn't get to hear the entire prophecy before my brother, the barman, threw him out."

Severus shook his head, finally opening his mouth. "But you say this prophecy was given to you a year ago, Professor," he said, confused. "Regulus died—"

"One year ago," finished Dumbledore. "Shortly after delivering his fragmented understanding of the prophecy to Lord Voldemort."

Severus was silent. He heard crying Lily, strong, feisty Lily who was so rarely weepy, and wished to put an arm out and comfort her but was unable.

Dumbledore surveyed him with an air of distaste and disappointment. "Remember my last, Severus," he said, his tone uncharacteristically dark. Lily looked askance at her husband, but Severus could only nod at the headmaster, essentially sealing the deal. Yes, Severus remembered the strange dreams that had plagued him throughout his O.W.L. year back in Hogwarts, and the headmaster's warning, and though he couldn't understand how Dumbledore could have seen the future (let alone get into his dreams), Severus's mind was set on his task. Protect her. Protect Lily. Or she would die.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**A/N: **

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Dumbledore sent them from his office with a wave of his hand. Lily stood, carefully holding Juniper to her chest, frowning at her husband when he did not follow.

"Headmaster," said Severus, staring at the old man with neither respect nor fear. "What were those dreams about?"

Dumbledore's bushy grey eyebrows rose. "What dreams?"

"The ones you made me have all through my O.W.L. year. The nightmares, the bad futures."

Dumbledore shook his head, looking entirely nonplussed. "Severus, I never made you have any dreams, not in your time as a student or ever."

The headmaster made no attempt to block Severus's stabbing Legilimency, and Severus saw that the old man told the truth—he hadn't given Severus those cruel dreams. He shook his head and fled from the room. After a curious glance back at Dumbledore, Lily followed, shushing Juniper's cooing.

(*&^%$#$%^&*(

_Severus knelt on a cold stone floor, blood sheeting down half of his pale face. His knees were bruised from the hard flagstones, his neck aching from the strain of holding his exhausted head up. _

"…_.I know nothing, My Lord, I swear it," he was murmuring fervently to a pair of long, deathly-white feet which protruded from under robes as black as the night outside. _

_One of the feet shifted. "Such lies, Severus…. No matter. I will break you. There is world enough, and time…. I have you for the rest of your days." _

_Severus made a muffled choking sound, and several droplets of blood dripped onto the floor beneath his face. "My Lord," he sputtered. "Surely you realize… I cannot tell you that which is unknown to me."_

_At this, the man standing before him let out a high, cold laugh. "Crucio!" _

_For the first time in that long night, Severus could not bite back his screaming. _

^&*(%$^&^%$

Lily shot upright, panting, and looked into the eyes of her husband, who had somehow simultaneously awoken beside her, her fear and horror mirrored in his eyes.

"Sev," she gasped, grabbing his shoulders. "You, I, I saw," she babbled senselessly, disgusted at both her shaking and the tears in her own eyes.

"I know," Severus replied, equally as panicked, kissing her eyelids. "I know, I saw it too."

"Are those the dreams?" she whimpered. "The ones you thought Headmaster Dumbledore was making you have?"

"Yes."

"And you had them back in fifth year?"

"Yes, and they were always horrible, you were dead and I was older. But one of them, one of them was nice, it came true, I saw June, she was about eleven."

"Blimey, Sev," Lily breathed, calming down some. "D'you reckon there's Seer blood in your family?"

He let out a shaky laugh and was about to reply when a long, keening scream sounded from the next room over.

Juniper's nursery.

Lily, reacting with the speed possessed by only a mother whose cubs are threatened, tore off the covers and sprinted from the room. Severus followed but a moment later, carefully snatching his wand from the bedside table.

Lily, however, who had been raised by Muggles, had gone wandless to face the unknown danger.

Severus peered cautiously into the now-silent nursery, wand lit, breath bated at the possibility of what he might see. Lily was on her knees beside the little crib, hands wrapped around the bars, unmoving.

Suddenly, she let out a piercing wail, not lifting her head up. Severus approached the crib warily, terrified of what could be inside. He let his wandlight bathe the crib in light, taking in the downy lavender blanket, the one or two soft toys, the silent and motionless hanging mobile.

Empty crib.

Black brand burned into the mattress.

The Dark Mark.

His sign.

Severus too fell to his knees, mouth agape, brain unwilling to accept this horrible turn of events. His only child, the tiny, perfect DNA mix of himself and Lily, snatched away by the merciless Dark Lord, that evil King of Shadows. He put out a shaking hand and grazed his wife's shoulder, trying futilely to soothe her aching. After several long moments, he found the courage to speak.

"Lily," he said softly. "I'll go find her." He noted with self-loathing that he could not bring himself to say his daughter's name.

His wife did not move. "I'll go with you," she whispered.

Severus shook his head fervently. "We're the Longbottoms' Secret-Keepers, remember? If we die, whoever we told becomes Secret-Keeper—only we haven't told anyone. I don't know what happens then. You need to stay alive."

Lily seemed to accept this. Severus stood in a fluid motion, leaving Lily kneeling on the floor. He had never been good at comforting her, or anyone.

She said nothing, merely drew a limp hand across her own stomach, and Severus knew that she was longing for a time past, when her baby child had been safe within her own womb, never apart from her.


End file.
